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Two best friends. Simple. But one loves the other. Only short.

“Come on, let me see.” Kathy said stretching out across the bed again towards the mobile clutched in Joe’s hand.

“No. Look, it’s nothing. No one.” Joe said with raised eyebrows, using his free hand to hold a squirming Kathy at bay.

“Liar!” She exclaimed with an excited shriek. “It’s a girl, and you’re holding back. Come on who is it?” She giggled.

“No one.” Joe said, struggling to withstand his serious look. “Please Kathy, just drop it, OK?” he pleading one last time.

“Fine.” Kathy breathed, releasing her hold on Joe’s arms and falling back into a sitting position on her bed.

After a short awkward silence, with neither of them trying to start a new topic, Kathy started again. “Is it that Chloe girl from school?”

“You don’t give up do you?” Joe said with an astounded look, to which Kathy flashed a cheeky grin. “And no… no it’s not anyone from school.” Joe said looking away from Kathy’s questioning gaze.

“So it is a someone.”  

“Argh! I hate you.” Laughing at that last part, so not true he thought.

“Why won’t you tell me?” she questioned with a serious look now. “You’re supposed to me my best mate. I tell you everything.” She said quietly, attempting to look hurt.

“I am not falling for that puppy dog trick. And you are my best friend, it’s just you know, weird.”

“Ok well tell me about her then. Or him, oh god is that why it’s weird?” Kathy exclaimed.

“Shut up, that’s not funny.”

“Well, you could be, I don’t know, do I. You’re not giving me much to go on here.” She said through stifled giggles.

Beep-Beep.

Joe dived into his pocket to quieten the phone as quickly as possible, in the off chance that Kathy wouldn’t hear.

“Mystery woman?” Kathy asked trying to catch a peek at the message on the phone, now, once again, in Joe’s hand.

“No, actually.”

“Really?” Kathy asked sarcastically. And with that she lunged forward and grabbed the phone from Joe’s grasp before making a dash for her bedroom door with Joe in hot pursuit. Joe managed to catch her by the elbow and pinned her against the wall but she’d already seen it, she read aloud:

“‘You told her you’re in love with her yet?’ From… Mike.” Kathy gave the text a puzzled look before looking up into Joe’s eyes filled with shock and horror as Kathy searched his face for an answer. Joe released his grasp around her and walked slowly back to her room, leaving Kathy puzzled with his phone. “In love? Oh my god you’re in love with this girl. And you still wont tell me who it is!?”

“Kathy, just shut up.” Joe said sternly, with a quick irritated look at her.

“No. I can not believe you won’t tell me who it is!” She shouted, waiting for Joe to give and answer. Silence. “Do you not trust me? Is that it? Do you think I’m going to go blabbing it all round school? I can’t believe after all these years you can’t trust me enough to share something that is obviously this important to you. You told Mike for f**k sake!” She shouted again, with a strong edge of hurt to her words.

“It’s not that simple.” Joe retorted back.

“But simple enough to tell Mike. Is it because I’m a girl? Is it because you don’t trust me? You think I’ll go tell Mandy and Ellie?” She shouted again.

“No!” Joe retorted back, hurt and angry.

“Well, why then!”

“It’s because it’s… you.” His voice deteriorated quickly from a shout to a small whisper, almost as if he was angry with himself. S**t he thought.

“What?” Kathy said breathlessly stunned in the awkward silence.

“Can you take me home now please?” Joe said avoiding her gaze, pretending the last three minutes of his life had never happened.

“Yea, I’ll take you home… after you tell me what the f**k is going on.”

“My Mum said she’ll be home at six, she’ll kill me if I’m late.”

            Joe picked up his coat from the bed, and held his hand out for his phone from Kathy. She stared at him in bewilderment before slapping the phone into his hand in frustration. She composed herself and decided to tackle this from a different angle.

“Joe?” Kathy questioned in a hushed tone.

“What?” Joe said looking down at the floor.

“Are you?” Kathy asked, her eyes glistening with tears.

“Yes.” Joe admitted almost silently after a few long seconds.

“How long?”

“A while.”

“How longs a while, exactly?”

“I don’t know,probably, for about, the past year? Maybe?”

“Oh my god. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Oh come on, Kath. It’s not really something you pop into the conversation, especially when it’s your best friend.” He said through gritted teeth while shaking his head, evidently ashamed with himself.

Kathy stared at him; she couldn’t comprehend how much this was going to change everything about their friendship, they had to sort it out. “Please, can you just take me home.” Joe pleaded.

“Well, we need to talk about this.” Kathy said, shocked that Joe was thinking they could just side step this and brush it away.

“No we don’t. You’re with Charlie and I’m your best friend, there’s nothing to discuss.” And with that Joe hurriedly walked out of her bedroom and down the stairs into the hallway. Kathy grabbed her car keys from her bedroom table and reluctantly followed.

 

In the car, they both sat silently. Neither of them even bothered to make small talk. But when Kathy pulled into Joe’s driveway, she switched off her engine and spoke.

“We can’t ignore this.” She said quickly, the words she’d kept inside for the past ten minutes were about to come flooding out, she swallowed them down. “Can I come in?”

            Joe replied with a slow nod and got out of the car with Kathy following. When inside Joe kicked of his shoes and headed for the kitchen in need of a glass of water. Kathy mimicked his actions and followed in silence to the kitchen but remained standing awkwardly in the doorway with her hands in the back pockets of her tattered jeans.

“So…” Joe said between gulps of water, “What’s the plan then?”

“I need to tell you something.” Kathy said, ignoring Joe’s question, still tentatively standing across the room from him.

“Ok.” Joe said apprehensively, setting down his empty glass on the side and leaning with his back to it.

            “About a month before I started going out with Charlie, I was having some pretty strong feelings for you.” She stared into Joe’s eyes watching his reaction, he looked down at the floor in disbelief, shaking his head. “I tried to ignore it, thinking it would go away, denial, I guess.” She said with a lame smile. “But it didn’t. So I tried to push it out, push it away… push you away, that didn’t work either. And then came along Charlie, this distraction, a distraction from you. A chance to forget how I felt about you. So I took it.” She paused momentarily, nerves showing in her voice as she stuttered out the truth to Joe. “Our friendship was too important for me to ever take that chance of you finding out, so I thought a distraction would be a safer way for me to stay around you.”

“Did it work?” Joe blurted out, unable to remain silent any longer, a million questions still waiting to pour out.

“I don’t know, would I be telling you this if it did?”

Not knowing what to say, Joe looked out of the window, away from Kathy’s gaze, who was evidently waiting for a reply. “So… Do you still feel the same way?” he said finally.

“I don’t know.” Kathy’s voice was breaking, her eyes glistening with tears again, while she shook her head.

“I’m a horrible person, I know, you don’t need to tell me.” She said quietly through tears while fidgeting nervously with her car keys in her hands.

            Joe moved slowly from the other side of the kitchen towards her, and placed his arms around her, Kathy rested her head on his shoulder, while she sobbed gently into the warmth of his thin, black, zipped jumper. “No your not.” He breathed while taking in the scent of her sweet smelling hair.

“I am, this isn’t fair on you or Charlie.” As she said it, her grip tightened around Joe, not wanting to let him go.

“Do you love him?” Joe said stiffly.

“No, I don’t think so.”

“And me?”

“Maybe.” She said, slowly pulling away from his shoulder and looking into his eyes. Joe’s hands moved from Kathy’s back to her waist as she pulled away but he gently pulled her back, still staring into her blue eyes. He bent his neck to Kathy’s level and her hand grazed the side of Joe’s cheek as he closed his eyes, while the other hand lingered on top of Joe’s chest in a fist around her keys. Kathy pushed her lips lightly onto Joe’s and his grip around her tightened. As he kissed her back, his heart beat faster, like he’d imagine it would a thousand times. His tongue gently pushed through her lips, which she welcomed as her hand moved from his cheek to the back of his neck and into his short, thick, dark hair, holding his head as close as humanly possible.

“Wait.” Kathy said breathlessly pulling away from his lips but remaining close enough for their noses to still be in contact. “This isn’t fair on Charlie.” She said quietly, almost a whisper. She pulled slowly away to look at Joe’s expression.

“Have you decided what your plan is now then?” He said with a small smile. Kathy replied with an eager nod also smiling slightly, appearing to have a silent conversation between the two.

“But, I have to sort Charlie out first.” Kathy said bringing a serious look back to her face. “Before we can go anywhere.” Joe looked slightly hurt at this. “That doesn’t mean I don’t want to. I just don’t want to feel any worse about hurting Charlie as it is.” Joe looked puzzled “For my own peace of mind.” She concluded.

“For your own piece of mind.” Joe repeated appearing to try to understand this the best he could. “Ok…” Kathy ran her hand back down his cheek, hoping he knew how strong her feelings were for him now. Joe caught her fingers between his and gently kissed the back of her hand.

            Kathy released herself from Joe’s hold. “I should be getting home.” She said with a small smile, and started walking towards the front door, with Joe following.

“When are you gonna tell him?” Joe questioned, standing behind Kathy in front of the door.

“Tomorrow.”

“Ok…well, err… call me or something. Yea?”

“Kay.” Kathy replied with a sweet smile.

            Joe nodded in reply with his hands in his pockets to with strain the urge to reach out and touch her, not wanting to disobey the rule Kathy had laid down only seconds ago. Kathy leaned forward on the balls of her feet with her hands at her sides, and lightly brushed her lips on Joe’s jaw line, before swiftly pulling back again. Without another word, Joe reached around her and pulled the latch down on the door. Kathy shuffled closer to Joe as the door swung in on them and then ducked under Joe’s arm still on the latch and walked slowly out of the house toward her car, aware that Joe was still watching her.