Birds of Ash

Birds of Ash

A Poem by lightningoddess
"

This is about the rise, fall and rebirth of the mythical bird the phoenix. Hope you all enjoy.

"
Form of smoke
Heart of fire
A demon bird
Flying higher

Eyes are perfect
Hearing sharp
Cry as beautiful
As the music of a harp

Gossamer feathers
Wings of ash
Trailing higher
The forming winds clash

Allure of the sun
Flying higher, risking death
Bird of innocence
Can almost feel the sun's breath

Too close now it comes
He bursts into flames
The phoenix is no more
He will play no more games

But rising from the ashes
The phoenix now stands
Forever searching
For new, foriegn lands

© 2011 lightningoddess


Author's Note

lightningoddess
Feel free to give criticism on this one. Any suggestions for improvement would be appreciated as well as what you liked about the piece.

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Reviews

Very nice imagery here. I agree with Neva - it'll give a better flow.

Posted 8 Years Ago


Absolutely beautiful, the only thing I would change is to remove some of your the's......it is even more wonderful when some of them are removed. Well done

Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on June 6, 2011
Last Updated on June 6, 2011

Author

lightningoddess
lightningoddess

Griffith, IN



About
I am 16, and in love with poetry, singing, quotes, drawing and photography. Basically anything creative I like. I started writing poetry the end of my freshman year, and i just finished my junior year.. more..

Writing
Grashben Grashben

A Chapter by lightningoddess