entirely possible

It is entirely possible to love someone and completely hate them at the same time. Its extremely painful to feel this way. It’s a never ending battle between emotions, literally a war against opposing sides of your heart.

 

I cannot stop overthinking, over analyzing every little god damn thing. Its like I am constantly trying to investigate any clue that will lead me to my heartbreak before it can attack me from behind. I want to find it first, I know its coming, I know for sure. I want to get to it before it gets to me. Somehow that is just a little less painful. In my mind I am inevitably going to be hurt or heartbroken or someone will be unfaithful to me. I am as sure of this as I am of the air that fills my lungs. To be able to look this pain in the face, and say look here f****r, I knew you were coming- just know that you did not outsmart me. I was prepared for you �" and that in itself is a small victory.