Monologue of a Broken Heart

I miss you. I long to hear your voice again. Your deep, soothing voice. The way you talk to me was so gentle, soothing, and I can feel your caring soul radiating from your voice, and from the warmth of your gaze. It fills me up and warms me inside. I'm addicted to you. I long to talk to you again, to share my life with you, for you to share your life with me, and I just want to get to know you more.

'Coz I know there;s more than meet the eye with you. The depth of your emotion and mind is like the calm soothing ocean. Occasionally it hit the sands with strong passionate waves, but most of the time it is just gently caressing the sands, like a lover's touch on the skin. My heart is like the sand, and you are like the ocean. I need you to caress me, touch me, so I can exist, and you are my source of love. I yearn for your love.

Yet you are a quiet soul. You don't talk much normally. It is usually other people who talk to you first, or you joining in a conversation. People may mistake you for aloof at first glance, but soon afterwards they will be won over by the gentleness of your voice, and the calmness of your soul. And when you are excited, there is that twinkle in your eyes that is so contagious. Your joyful soul shone through that sparkle, like a star that twinkles in the dark of night. And your mind is wise too. It governs your body, and control your tongue from speaking evil or deceit. In other words you are a good person.

Many girls find you attractive. Not only me. I would watch from a distance as other girls would come near you and talk to you, trying to get your attention. It is not that I have never done that. I have tried to get your attention too. You are so irresistible. Yet somehow now there is a wall between us. You never approach me again. And you avoid eye contact with me. I do not know what to do. And my heart is saddened every time I see you talking with other girls. Mostly they approaching you first. And jealousy will always stand by the door of my heart, trying to get in. As I watch you and the other girls.

Somehow I feel that you have a girl that you care about. The girl that is in your heart. My instinct as a woman tells me. You would approach her and talk to her. You would always stand near her, and be beside her. I cannot express how much it pained my heart every time I see you together with her. And I will never forget the time when you got up from your seat next to me, to go and sit beside her. How heavy was the rain that poured down in my heart! Inside I was crying, crying and crying. I could not contain it from my face. I was so saddened. My heart was crushed. My friends noticed and asked me if I was alright. I lied to them. And I was left gasping for air. It felt suffocating, like my heart can't breathe. And I had to leave, and I cried on the way home.

If that is so that you love her, why do you have to meet up with me when I told you I was in trouble? Is it just out of pity and friendship? I'd rather you not ask me out and made me pour out my heart to you. Can't you see that I will tell you the truth when you ask me anything? You took the opportunity to see me in my nakedness. I had bared my heart and soul to you, and you had given me warmth. But afterwards you took back again your blanket, and I was left exposed, cold and empty. You did not talk to me again after that, and I regret revealing myself to you. How cold-hearted you can be, or are you just ignorant, or stupid?

I do not want to rely on you anymore. I often feel the impulses to message you, to want to talk to you. Because I like you. And I know I may not be able to control myself when the longing comes. So I had decided that it was best that I delete you from my life. It may seem dumb, but I want to break the shackles that you have wrapped around my heart. I shall not depend on you anymore. And I will cut the strings from my heart that I have latched to you. And I will bury any memory that we had together. 

Good bye...you... Good bye...Good bye...

Reviews

[Corisica]

Oy! This is wrenching in several ways. I can relate to this feeling of jealousy/ being second best. I can particularly relate to the last paragraph... wanting to delete someone from my life. I've done it too.... but via all social networks.... We find out though, that sometimes it doesn't always work.
"I often feel the impulses to message you, to want to talk to you. Because I like you." The struggle is real, very real here. I can feel it throughout your writing. The only thing that tripped me up was a few grammatical errors. They didn't take away from the story as a whole though.