If...

Questions is the name of the game right here RIP J.Jenkins....

If I said

that I loved you

no matter what...

 

would that have stopped you?

I dont think it would have.

I think it would have stopped

the call you made to me

at what...

2 am? Yes, 2 am...that hour

when theres a light fog

a mist over the grass, the sleeping

world.

 

You had to call me.

You had to tell me...

to my face,

which you never did.

Im not angry anymore...

I don't feel angry anyway...

If...

 

You didnt come into my life,

would you have still pulled

the trigger? Would you

still have left your mark,

no, lets be real,

left your brain matter

on the roof of that car?

 

Yeah...you would have.

 

Would I have been

a different person?

Yeah, I would have.

Would I be so quick

to tell people how

I really feel?

No. I dont think so.

 

It's not everyday

that someone you

love declares something

only to stop the words

with a bullet.

 

It's been ....

I don't know

I don't want

to remember...

October 2nd something

or other date...

And you still f*****g

linger in there.

In the vodka I can't

stand to smell

In the angry taps

of the keyboard...

 

If....

If I were more

would you have

done it?

 

Yeah, you would have...

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Living with the memories of someone who took their own life leave us wondering the why's and if's. Lost two brothers to suicide. I go back in time and can't figure the who and why's. Your poem is powerful. Something dance in our head forever. A excellent poem. Description and your story was powerful.
Coyote

[Mike Espinosa]

This was very well done. Your word choice set a very good image of the scene depicted. Some phrases didn't sound right in my head, but I'm sure if spoken, they'd make perfect sense roll gracefully. Overall, very good piece.

[Narnie]

Not often I get moved - goosebumped skin and eyes kinda smarting. I'm glad the poem ended with the words it did. Guilt is the most debilitating and so often misplaced legacy of suicide. I'm hugging you. You are a wonderful poet. And everything else too.

[Hippy]

its very moving and i know the feeling of losing a loved one to suicide my brother went by the rope this really made me think of him and i realize thats a large talent of yours a great one to to make the reader feel the emotion you pour onto the paper i really like that great job at expressing this

[Elise]

This was truly excellent, and held my attention from the beginning.
I like the emotion, and I like how it's making me think. This really struck me, and I like how you think.
Amazing poetry, a stunning write.

[cest la vie]

The sadness of suicide is the unanswered questions. I think it takes a great deal of courage to end one's life. However, the remnants left behind are left to fester.
Beautifully expressed here.

[Anathema Herem]

Ouch. Good imagery, but that must have been hell to put down in words.