Jarred

 

Empty worry inside the pain,

Wondering if I'll ever see the light,

Don't want to keep up the strain,

so I guess I just have to fight.

 

When my world tumbles around me I feel soemthing new,

nothing tender nothing sweet,

but a new color,

a new hue.

 

A hue of darkest blacks and blues,

scraping me from head to toe,

wonder if anyone else knew,

how different some things grow.

 

Everyone can change their ways,

for good or bbad,

it's not the same,

 

 

Like a bottle never opened,

I remain to keep unspoken,

Bottled up inside a jar,

Never thought it'd go this far.

Author's Note

plz review... what do you thinnk...

Reviews

[deeps]

Wonderful rhyme scheme and flow.
Very well written. Second stanza to the last you have bad spelt wrong.

[Mary]

great poem:) You need some editing...but just read through it! Has emotion and it does leave an impact like nomster said:) I like it, it is a little different from your normal work:)

[Aussie]

The flow was a bit off,but it was a good piece.
I like the way this leaves you with a feel of pressure and being weighed down. Like a timebomb waiting to blow. A sick and anxious feeling,almost.
This was a nice write,I enjoyed it(: