Miscommunications

when you love them but they don't understand like they used to.

i fell so easily in love with you

i swear you must have felt it too

these past few times you haven't came through

you've got me wondering what did i do?

sometimes i feel like you don't listen to what i'm saying

i'm getting so sick of these miscommunications

feels like we're missing out on all these celebrations

because of all of this time spent on pointless fornication

remember the days it was us against the world

those were the times i truly felt heard

for the last while i've been without word

i don't know if the silence was what i preferred

i tried looking at the stars to get some f*****g space

but this pulse within me, no one could replace

everything we shared, i wish i could erase

know i'll fall to you next time i see your face

feeling this unhappy shouldn't come as a shock

there's this room in my mind i only let you unlock

you want the old me but there's no rewind on the clock

so next time please just hear me when i talk

Reviews

[Chryiss]

There's a real nice build up to this piece. The rhythm and rhyme gets stronger as it goes on, and it matches the growing intensity of the mood. Oddly enough, the all lowercase somehow added to the mood and feel too; it reminded me of miscommunication in texting where often people don't capitalize. At least, that's what it reminded me of. Only one suggestion, some stanzas would nicely accentuate the poem's changes and build-up in mood. It would also let the reader digest some of the lines and feelings.