Terry Goodkind's Abridged Works

Terry Goodkind is a hack, 'nuff said.

Bad Guys: We're the eeeeeeeeevil empire! We're everything the author disagrees with and thus we're so EEEEEEVIL ARE YOU NOT THREATENED YET?

Richard: HEY LET ME SHARE MY OPINIONS WITH YOU FOR SEVERAL PAGES

Strawmen: We're pacifists and we're evil for some reason

*Richard slaughters the pacifists*

Richard: THOSE PACIFISTS DESERVED TO DIE HORRIBLY BECUASE THEY LACK MY MORAL CLARITY BECAUSE THEY'RE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL AND WANTED ME TO FIGHT FOR THEM BECAUSE THAT'S TOTALLY WHAT PACIFISM IS ALL ABOUT, RIGHT GUYS? BY THE WAY, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT POLITICS FOR A FEW MORE PAGES

Richard: OH NO WE FORGOT ABOUT THE PLOT

*Deus Ex Machina Happens*

Richard: BOY IT'S GOOD THAT I PULLED A CONTRIVED SOLUTION OUT OF MY A*S,NOW I CAN TALK ABOUT MY OPINIONS AGAIN

Reader: F**k this s**t, I'm reading Tolkien instead

Reviews

[Detective Watts]

I rate this 5 angry, objectivist stars

[StarNinja]

Hilarious, dude! You need to do more of these.