5

5

A Chapter by W.V. Bard
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Pacha meets up with Keko.

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5

 

Pacha gripped the forearms of her village kin.

“Hello, again,” he said.

“Hello,” Pacha whispered back, tears coming to her eyes.

Keko smiled at her.  His dark brown eyes sparkled through his own brimming tears, shadowed by the long brown fringe across his forehead.

The two walked back to her camp together, flanked by his four guards and two of her own, and Keko slowly began to answer her many questions.

He had been selected as one of three boys, then one of two, and, finally, on the third day, after an interview of sorts with each Processor, he had been suddenly thrust under their care and carried from the village in much the same manner as she had.  After he was Chosen, he did not look back at his parents’ grief.  “It is an honour,” he explained.

Pacha mourned for her own parents.  How she missed them.  And yet this stoic boy seemed not to miss his own at all.

By the time they had sauntered back to camp, there was not much camp left.  Pacha had been so caught up in Keko’s story that she had failed to notice her Processors picking up and folding her tent along with their own.  They were just packing all of their furs and cloths into their bags as Pacha and Keko approached the site.

“This is where we slept, I guess waiting for you,” she stated lamely.

“By a shrine,” observed Keko. 

“By the Night’s Pass,” Pacha stressed.

He went to kneel by the shrine adjacent to their camp and say his blessings.  Pacha went with him, letting the others to their own affairs as they finally let her. 

She found herself thanking the gods for her escorts taking such good care of her, as brusque as they were.  Seeing the pack on Keko’s back startled her into realizing that either a Processor had given up his tent for her or someone was carrying two sets of furs and leathers.  She thanked the sun and moon gods for the kind hosts who had lodged them along the way, and most of all prayed for thanks for being reunited with a familiar face, although a twinge of worry soiled that prayer.

She looked up from stacking prayer stones into the staring eyes of her fellow captive.

“Thank them for the crops.”

“There are no crops.”

“Mother told me to thank them for the crops.”

Pacha added another stone in silence.  Not for the crops, but for herown mother.

They stood and the squad of Processors took their turns piling stones at the foot of the tiny sun and moon gods, half covered in moss and sticking out of the ground at an awkward angle.  Cracks covered the statue from the top of its stony flames to the bottom edge of its crescent moon.  Sprouts even broke free from some of the deeper cracks.  As revered as they were, these gods did not look as formidable as they might.  But the spirit of the gods resided in the Reincarnates when thet did not reside in the clouds, not in some inanimate statue on an old and broken trail.

Pacha wondered at the possibility of being an incarnate.  She had never felt a holy moment or displayed any godly qualities besides those of her eyes and build.  She might look the part, but no one could be further from godly.  Except maybe that boy the last matron had described as quite the troublemaker.

But the entire process of choosing based solely on looks irked her.  Why would an incarnate have to look like the original?  Would not the holy presence be a better predictor of who was and who was not a reincarnation of the great Forefather and Mother?

“What are you thinking?”  Keko finally asked her.

“Just that it’s all so unfair �"“

“It is an honour,” repeated Keko.

“Never have there been two Reincarnates from the same village,” Pacha whispered to her boots.

Keko swallowed hard and a small line appeared between his brows.  “Well,” he said, “really until you were Chosen, we have never hosted a Reincarnate at all.”

Pacha stopped in her path.  “What do you mean until I was chosen?” she demanded, but the boy just walked on.

She caught up to him �" he was still frowning.  “What do you mean?”  She pulled him around to face her.

“Only what I said,” he admonished.  The tears in his eyes sparkled, and as he spoke they widened and widened so that he only looked younger and younger, until Pacha had to doubt their age gap. “You know that you were meant to be Chosen.  When you were born I remember �" the whole village spoke loudly of you and the honour you might one day bring.” 

Pacha pursed her lips.

“They named you Pacha for a reason.”

She glared down at him.  She had always hated the vacant meaning of her name.

“We’d better go,” he said, glancing at the Processors more than three stone throws away.  “Remember, Pacha, it’s an honour.”  He stared at her intently.  “You’re an honour.”  And without further ado he was off, running to catch up with their captors/protectors.



© 2012 W.V. Bard


Author's Note

W.V. Bard
Review please! Be mean!

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Featured Review

Ok, bad news first: you need to look where you place your quotations. for example- She caught up to him " he was still frowning.- whats with the (") in the center of that sentence? and again a few sentences down- When you were born I remember " the whole village spoke loudly of you and the honour you might one day bring.- By the way honor does not have a "U" in it. Good news: You have (besides the random quotation marks) great sentence structure. Keep up the great work! This is an enjoyable read.
Love,
CreativeCookie

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

W.V. Bard

8 Years Ago

Oooh I love bad news. Means critiques! Unfortunately, these two errors occur when I copy and paste.. read more



Reviews

Sorry for taking so long to get back to this piece. So far you're doing a good job with the story structure and the pacing. It is all coming together and I think you tightened things up to make it easier to follow. However, I find it hard to sympathize with the M.C. Maybe this is because a lack of information about her. Something just seems bland about her. Something just doesn't compel me to root for her. Still, the originality of the story is enough to keep me reading it; and you are a good writer. Thanks for sharing, i'll keep reading!

Posted 8 Years Ago


Ok, bad news first: you need to look where you place your quotations. for example- She caught up to him " he was still frowning.- whats with the (") in the center of that sentence? and again a few sentences down- When you were born I remember " the whole village spoke loudly of you and the honour you might one day bring.- By the way honor does not have a "U" in it. Good news: You have (besides the random quotation marks) great sentence structure. Keep up the great work! This is an enjoyable read.
Love,
CreativeCookie

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

W.V. Bard

8 Years Ago

Oooh I love bad news. Means critiques! Unfortunately, these two errors occur when I copy and paste.. read more
nice good job

Posted 8 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

good potray of characters,nice sketching of the scenes all in all a great job :-)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

W.V. Bard

8 Years Ago

Thank you! Any...critiques? I love "bad news"

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Added on November 12, 2012
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W.V. Bard
W.V. Bard

Seattle, WA



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A seasoned writer looking for fellow writers in order to connect, motivate and be motivated, inspire and be inspired, critique and be critiqued. more..

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A Chapter by W.V. Bard


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A Chapter by W.V. Bard


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A Chapter by W.V. Bard