Thinking Out Loud

A four line poem using 1 syllable for the first line 5 syllables for the second line 5 syllable for the 3rd line 9 syllable for the 4th line

Thinking out loud

Minds'

memories fill thought

of haves and have not …

be happy that you never forgot!

Author's Note

Hope if you happen to stop by and read my little poem you will take the time to review ...
I always review whatever I read,
Lisa

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

Beautiful, meaningful poem Lisa... My interpretation is that never forget your status in life and if you can help those who are destitute, then do so, the "HAVES" should think of the "HAVE NOTS"....because many times the "HAVE NOTS" do share with each other....lovely structure and grace to this piece...
WARMLY, B

[Lisasview]

Every time I tried to respond to your thoughtful review the site would not allow me to type... Luckily
I just tried again...
I just love that you understood the true meaning of my poem.
Thank you so so much for reading and reviewing dear Betty,
Lisa

[Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn..]

Lisa,

very beautifully expressed words and lines of Life's truth that do ring and sing a philosophical note.

Marvin Thomas Cox-Flynn de Graham

[Lisasview]

Good morning dear Marvin,
My life got in the way so I have not been on Writers Cafe very much recently... Thank you so much for your kind review...always a pleasure to hear from you,
Lisa

[William Michael Reeves]

Once we lose a memory so much is lost. But then at least we don't know it, it's just gone. And darnitt, the loss doesn't make any more space in our minds. That's what I thought.

I kept trying to read to the ninth line but failed. Check your description, I'm sure that's a typo. Does this little form have a name? Did you make it up? Call it a Lisaku.

[Lisasview]

Hi there,YES, typo should read 4th line...
Okay this was a 4 line poem... No name to it... I entered my poem into a contest.
When I was little I tried not to have too many thoughts in my brain (I was very young) because I wasn't sure that there would be enough room..
I haven't been on here much lately... just busy with other things.
Lisa

[William Michael Reeves]

That's a cute idea worth writing about ... I try not to have too many thoughts because there might not be room for them. I love it! I'm glad you're busy ... there in Spain.

[Lisasview]

I have had a rather difficult year... First, we have had a nightmare of over three years with our Visas so we have not been able to leave Spain. Sadly my younger sister got married on October 1, in California, and we could not go.
We now have an immigration lawyer who is trying to sort all this out. There was a mistake in our paper work (not our fault) that has cost us thousands of dollars to try and resolve.
Then, I had two terrible falls. First broke my clavicle and about a month after that I fell against a jagged stone wall and broke 3 ribs... all of this on my right side so I was unable to type. paint or play piano for months.... Now I am much better... Anyway, that is why you see very little work from me.
Lisa

[William Michael Reeves]

Holy cow Lisa! A year to remember to forget! I remember your clavicle episode. Didn't know you wanted to leave Spain. Back here to the states?

[Lisasview]

NO NO sorry I wrote a confusing message... YIKES...
We want to stay in Spain but the deal is that we must stay here because without a visa we can not travel outside of Spain...if we leave will not be able to get back in...Sounds weird I know, but that is the way it is... We have spent loads of money since we moved here 3 years ago to activate our Golden Visa...but because of the mistake made when we moved here we have been unable to get this issue rectified...The thing is we bought and renovated a house ...which is gorgeous... we love it here... Perfect for us...

[redzone]

haves and hav... what, where am I, what was I doing?? er... help Lisa, who am I??
..
..
..
..
wait.... Lisa told me I was to forget, and now everything is blurry, grey and getting dark... wait, I know I got stuck on the "have-nots"...

sorry Lisa I had to tease you a little... I have remembered that I enjoyed reading your well thought out poem and it's neat struture... thank you for sharing...

[Lisasview]

Thank you so much for your very fun review!! I really appreciate it..
Your take is hilarious!
Lisa, still in Spain

[emmajoygreen]

Your poem is melodic yet - concise; there isn't a spark missing from the glow, Lisa. Meaningful and wonderfully sol!

[Lisasview]

How nice of you to say such wonderful things about my little poem Emma,
Thank you so much,read moreHow nice of you to say such wonderful things about my little poem Emma,
Thank you so much,
Lisa

[emmajoygreen]

Seem to have lost touch, erratic visits in here although having to keep online cos of techno reasons, Lisa. Owe so many reviews. Is always a pleasure (reads hackneyed, sorry) to read your words.

[Lisasview]

No worries Emma, Life does often get in the way...
I understand.
Lisa

[emmajoygreen]

So very true, Lisa. Happy October!.

[Lisasview]

And, back to you!

[Lorry]

I like the title. I think I may even have used that in a line somewhere in the long ago, as it is something I say when people catch me talking to myself, which can even lead to quite feisty arguments. I once asked myself why I was in the kitchen, after forgetting what I went in for. Then I answered "why you asking me? You know I don't know! Then I had to go have a word with myself in the mirror to calm myself down. I'm glad no one saw that! 😊
I like this piece. It fits well to being so succinct and has a definite message wrapped within it.
The third line even plays with the fourth and changes its meaning to
"be happy that you never have forgot" and "be happy that you never have not forgot." if that makes sense.

[Lisasview]

I thought for sure I replied to your wonderful review Lorry when I read it last week???
Weird... maybe I forgot to post my comment??
I am so happy to see you got the essence of my poem... I enjoy writing like that... putting (or is the word getting?) people off guard.
It was a four line poem for a contest with no need to rhyme... but the rhyme came naturally to me... and I feel it worked.
Thank you again for your great review,
Lisa

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

This is like a psalm or something similar we must never forget the poor or those hungrier or those in need
I love it
Hope you are well Lisa x

[Lisasview]

Wow, a psalm... how wonderful of you to say such a kind thing about my little 4 line poem.
I so appreciate it Julie,
Lisa

[Cherrie Palmer]

...the haves and have nots...
It seems it is those who have tasted the 'have nots' are the ones who share with others when they 'do have'.

[Lisasview]

Hi Cherrie,
I find it so very interesting to read back at my many reviews and to see that most readers feel the same way about the meaning of my little poem.
I believe that this is what most writers hope for.
To get their message ~ thoughts - across...
Lisa

[Patricia Wedel]

dearest Lisa... my Father loved Shakespeare... so I walk on a Trapeze in the breeze of Memories. I appreciate your poems, and especially this one. softly, Pat

[Lisasview]

Hi Pat,
Walking on a trapeze in the breeze of memories!!! How very wonderful that my little 4 line poem opened up doors to your great memories.
Lisa

[Ken e Bujold]

knowing how much time and effort you put into your lyrical choices Lisa, I must congratulate you on the success of this small gem. The theme is executed with style and grace. But really caught my eye, as a tactical poet is your clever feet. Here's hoping many will take time to truly study the poem and gleam what i am getting at.

Ken

[Lisasview]

Hi Ken,
What I always find so strange about my writing is that nothing is ever planned.
So when you say
as a tactical poet is your clever feet. Here's hoping many will take time to truly study the poem and gleam what i am getting at.
This blows me away...my clever feet just happened...
I love your supportive review and have read it several times... really means a lot to me that you get what I write about.
Did you happen to read my new Sonnet... I need to do a very small bit of correcting on two lines and they are incorrect. I always edit my work even after I post it.
All my best, Lisa... in Spain

[Ken e Bujold]

Well Lisa, what we often think of as just occurring is actually the discipline of hard work becoming so natural we don't think of it as anything but.
my reference to your clever feet is in regard to the beat structure of your fine poem. 1/5/5/9 or 1/5 and 5 (10)/ 9 to the one makes 10
is a very clever structure

ken

[Lisasview]

I had no idea that you actual understood all this!
Had I known I feel I would have been asking you loads of questions.
Not sure if you know this or not but until I joined Writers Cafe I had never shared my work with anyone. I had absolutely no training in writing poetry. So sad that my schooling was lacking.
I have been writing since I was a child ... When I had Covid a year ago last January I decided to look for a free site where I could post my poem. Hand~In~Hand... within minutes of posting it Richard wrote me saying that my poem was actually a Sonnet.... I did not even know what a Sonnet was. He said with a little help with the last two lines it would be perfect and asked If I might like his help. Well, of course I did. Lucky me ...
Thank you again, for taking the time to review and now to explain "clever feet"
I really appreciate it,
Lisa, 4:30pm in Spain

[Ken e Bujold]

no trouble at all Lisa. The short time you have been at this mug's game makes the poem all the more impressive. While I don't write much in the ancient forms these days, I am as they say classically trained. Been writing poetry since I left the womb, or so it seems. Was fortunate enough to have been mentored by some of Canada's finest in my University days. From the experimental of Nichols, to the free verse of Ondaatje and Purdy, to Elizabethan scholars. So, I am always aware and intrigued by technical choices poet's make.

glad you found Richard, he is a very strong mentor to the style you perfer.

always feel free to ask me any questions you might have on the ins and outs of poetry, from its construction to aspiring themes. door is always open

ken

[Lisasview]

What a doll you are to offer and I just might take you up on that!
I so envy you schooling...lucky, lucky you..
Where are you in Canada?

[Ken e Bujold]

toronto aka hogtown