I am afraid of people

A poem about a small girl being treated horribly by her peers, having to learn the hard way how to be accepted and begging that noone have to go through what she did.

 

                 

 

 

 

 

I used to be afraid of people

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was so low

And them

So high

 

I didn't like the gum

Not in my hair

I didn't like the shoes

Reaching out of nowhere

 

I really hated

All the giggling groups

 

Once I was afraid of people

 

Cuz sometimes

They'd throw rocks at me

Or lock me in a dumpster bin

 

Sometimes Im afraid of people

 

Because people are so very cruel

But I wanna love the people

I wanted to be cool

I was such a person

 

So naive

I believed

In all the cliches

 

And used them in many ways

And tolerated all the bad days

 

Cuz everyone would say

 

" just be yourself in every way"

 

It was a lie

 

You can't deny

I spent thirteen years

Following

That hopeful lullaby

 

So pay me back

For all the tears

You caused

 

It only ever stopped

When I paused

And I smiled

 

Oh, all the while

I cried through it all

And they never riled me up again

 

I had so many friends

But only if I remembered

Don't frown

If you do

You'll only ever drown

 

And they'll remember

They're not your friend

And it'll end

 

It don't matter

If you become a clown

Because if you turn that smile upside down

Your real

Much, much too real

 

They should peel

That perfection off their faces

For all the bruises and all the grazes

Their optimism sentenced you to

 

Sometimes Im still scared of people

 

But they can't tell

I'll smile I'll smile I'll smile

 

It dosent matter if I'm thinking

'Go to hell'

While giggling and innocently blinking

 

"Please, please don't sell your lies"

 

I dont wanna hear

Of another little girls cries

having to last thirteen years in misery

As second after heart-destroying second

Melts by

 

 

 

http://youtu.be/IiHhTdg8qrc

 

Reviews

[Tree]

A beautifully revealing, and sad poem. It kills me when I see bullying of any type I have no tolerance for it. Even older people still do it, in a manipulating low-intensity kinda way... But you seem smart, compassionate, and beautiful. It tells me you got through it; never give in to the negativity Never let anyone strip you of a good heart...

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

thanx so much diego :-)

[Heromen Selena]

Such deep emotions in each word. Every new stanza I felt another wave of sadness envelop me. This is so beautifully written. I was a dork myself in secondary school, but it was never this bad. Hopefully bullies will eventually be stopped completely. Wonderfully written again.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

I like it when others learn from my writing :-) and people wont do anything unless they feel so I try to make them feel and feel and feel until to them the pain is all to real

[Heromen Selena]

It's a great way to get a message across. Effective indeed.

[Lena M. P.]

I feel the pain you have shared however it is the pain of youth. Pain of finding one's way. Pain of eking out an identity in this world. As others stumble through their own identity crisis they strike out at those they can or that they envy. She too pretty, he's so smart, she is so athletic, she is too cute. There are always reasons and yet they hurt those not strong enough to fling the words away. Nicely written and emotional.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

thank you! I try to make my work highly emotional

[Shimmerbliss/CAF]

You write of such painful experiences. It is heartbreaking that anyone goes through such bullying and abuse. You make a point that the saying " just be yourself in every way" is one that you felt set you up. I'm not sure if I agree at first read, but after rereading and much thought, I can see your point. Perhaps, what I think of when I hear that phrase is to thicken up my skin, be secure in who I am, and realize that not everyone will agree with me or "like" the way I am. In school though, well, in any social situation, it is may be necessary at times to keep a bit of ourselves to ourselves until we know who we can trust. To me, that is not - not being yourself...it is just being cautious, knowing that there are a lot of people who just like to bully, and put down others so they can feel better about themselves. As you can see, your poem has got me thinking a lot...and that is so good. This is one I will be considering all day. Hmmm.... nice job of expressing, and being open enough to want to help someone else who might be going through what you did. Maybe even someone who went through it themselves.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

Thanx so much shimmerbliss! your review makes me so happy! i'm glad you understand where I'm coming from in the poem the truth is I was myself to much myself to open to kind, and then I was miserable and I showed I was miserable my every expression open to anyone who cared to look and ppl would say that openness was the right thing to do. But it wasn't and I don't want others to go through what I did. Also I often do write poems I want ppl to learn from even if I havent been through it personally. A poem isnt just a pretty thing its a story and I feel a poem hasnt done its job if the context within isnt just as deep if not deeper than any one story.

[shultzfeather]

real deal stuff, love it

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

*takes a bow* thanx you, thank you!

[zainul]

This is a great gesture of a small girl who wants no other girl should suffer the same misery as herself.The list of bullies,frowns and tortures are quite long and one should read the real life poem to know what might happen to a girl in her life.
There are many sentences that impressed me.I mention some of them here.
1.I used to be afraid of people
2.They'd throw rocks at me
3.Or lock me in a dumpster bin
4.I'll smile I'll smile I'll smile
5.please, please don't sell your lies
Finally,I can't resist the temptation to paste this part:
"I dont wanna hear

Of another little girls cries

having to last thirteen years in misery"
Well done,Hannah.
Congratulations!!!

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

Thanx zainul!! I'm glad you liked it. This is actually the only poem I'v ever written while not in class lol

[zainul]

Thank you,Hannah!!!
I adore you for the humanist gesture.
At least some awareness may be expected among people through such
literary works

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

i try to make people aware of certain things in the majority of my poems. Iv been told I write in a way where it is nye impossible to ignore certain ... issues.

[zainul]

Thanks again for such beneficial activity.
You will be rewarded for this someday.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

:-)

[zainul]

:-)

[M.E.Lyle]

It's easy to feel the anguish you went through. Being 13 is a rotten thing for anybody. I wouldn't go back there for anything.
You say you have a problem recognizing some of your writing mistakes...me too, but here are a few I noticed. You wrote,"Somtimes I'm afraud of people." I think you meant afraid...not afraud. "Much, much to real." You should have used...too instead of ...to. "For all the bruises and the grazes." I'm guessing grazes should have been gazes. "Their optimism sentenced you to." Again I think you meant to use... too instead of... to. A few punctuational mistakes, but you're doing well. Keep writing, remember....practice, practice, practice.
Oh...keep smiling

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

thanx lol but grazes was what I meant you know minor scratch or abrasion?
and this wasnt what happened when I was 13 this was what happened during 13 yrs.. but yeah thanx especially the to thing I know I do that alot

[M.E.Lyle]

OK, now grazes makes sense...silly me. I don't know why I assumed 13 was an age and not a passage of time. I need to read more carefully. The ...too...thing, I have the same problem which is why I probably pick up on it when others do it, that and using...were... when I should use...where.

[Emily Dickinson Jr.]

yeah lol its hard to get it all thats why its good when others notice

[M.E.Lyle]

I agree.