The Brain, The Body, The Self, The Others

TRIGGER WARNING FOR MENTAL ILLNESSES

*This poem is written in the perspective of the Anxious Brain, the Body, and The True Self of a person with mental illness, specifically anxiety disorders and depression, and the Others around them.*

I can't do this.

This is too hard.

Why does this happen to me?

This doesn't make any sense. 

Gah, I just want to die.

You can do this.

You've been through this before.

You know it will go away in time.

You'll feel better soon.

Are you really doing this again?

You just want attention.

Just calm down and get over yourself.

It's all in your head.

Tremble.

Cold.

Hot.

Puke.

Tremble.

Cold.

Hot.

Puke.

Ew. That's disgusting.

Stop puking everywhere.

Control yourself.

I'm nervous too but I don't act like you.

Shut up!

I know you can do this.

You're stronger than your disorder!

You are not broken.

You can do this.

WE can do this.

I can do this.

Okay, calm       calm     calm.

Clear mind.

No more puking.

Heart rate slows.

Cool down.

A little shaky.

See?

I knew you could do it.

Great job.

Keep going.

You've got this.

I know you do.

I've got this.

It'll be over soon.

I just have to control the shaking.

There.

*I wanted to make this to show my process of thinking during an anxiety attack. The green words (I'm sorry if they're a little hard to read) are my real mind. My real mind is rational and knows that soon the anxiety will pass and everything will be okay. The blue is how my body responds to the different words being said or thought. The black is my anxious mind at the time. And the red are the people that don't understand or that make fun of you or don't believe you. The red also represents the thoughts you have that are not going to help at all, the part of you that doesn't understand what's going on. I hope this cleared up the poem as I know it can't be easy to understand from an outside perspective.*