Angel and Demon

Few thousand years ago, an angel and a demon came on a chance to pass each other unaware on earth. The angel was on earth enjoying the scenery with her pet an ice phoenix. The angel always resumes a mortal form when she was on earth as she does not wish to be disturbed. She enjoys spending her free time on earth as earth was unspoiled few thousand years ago. Her favorite place was a lake in a forest clearing; where she enjoys lazing around and playing in the water.

 

          One day, a demon came along in a mortal form as he too wishes to be undisturbed. He had curly; shoulder-length hair is the color of coffee with cream and hooded sky-blue eyes. He came to the lake as he was feeling restless and felt like ending his life. His element was fire so he can only end his life using water.

 

          He didn’t notice the angel bathing as he was too busy thinking of what he had to do but the angel heard him coming as he took no care of hiding his foot steps. The demon when to the edge of the clear blue pond and started to walk towards the middle of the deep hole in the pond. At first the angel was puzzled, then she quickly realize what he was trying to do and rescued him as she did not know that the male was a demon.

 

          After rescuing the demon she realizes what he was and froze him to prevent him from attacking her. Her phoenix helped keep an eye on their prisoner while the angel finished her bath quickly. She realized that she can’t allow the demon to move free on earth as demon was every angel and mortal enemy but kept him alive as she was partly curious about him and why would an immortal kill himself. Further more she was fully aware of his handsome form even though she won’t admit it to herself besides he is a demon and she could have nothing to do with one of the demon kind maybe unless to kill it.

 

          She and her phoenix spend the night on earth; she to talk to the demon and her phoenix to keep an eye on the demon, after all, the angel is still a female and the demon a male. She was a very pretty and witty angel but she was very frosty and bad tempered as her element as of the ice. She was not afraid of the demon escaping as she has quick reflex and the demon knew that she would be unmerciful to the him should he ever chance to escape as she made no secret of it.

 

          The demon was also a handsome and witty guy and is very cocky and annoying, hides his emotions well too. Sometimes too well till his kind think of him as emotionless. Despite their differences they manage to get on quite well together considering what they are. There is after all a saying that opposites attract each other. However the phoenix had little tolerance of the demon and keeps refreezing the demon’s body whenever the ice was growing thin or when it was feeling very annoyed, which is always as it had little tolerance with demons…

 

          The next day, the angel let the demon go after arguing with her phoenix to prove her view that it was wiser then keeping him frozen. She argued that they can’t continue keeping an eye on him and refreezing. After the demon was unfroze the angel challenged him to a duel. The demon’s name was unknown but he was called Angelas Hunter by his kind as he loves hunting and killing angels. He was unable to attack the angel in front of him even after killing plenty of angels because he fallen in love with her during the night. He felt that the angel was different from the rest as she was not self-centered, arrogant or annoying at all. She really cared and was interested in him.

 

          The angel was puzzled by the demon’s lack of response, as besides protecting himself he did not move to attack her even when she pretend to let down her guard. She was crossed that the demon was not attacking and took it as an insult that the demon thought she wasn’t strong enough. She was one of the top of her kind as she was not pure angel but a mixture of angel and a slight demon. This makes her a slight guardian, a creature which all of nature bows to and is harder to kill then a pure blood.

 

          The angel stopped attacking and put her hands on her hips, looking at the demon quizzically wondering what in heaven’s and hell’s name was wrong with him. She went close to him and scolded him like he was a little child to raise his temper. When that didn’t work she tried slapping him, but he caught her hand and pull her close, so close and hard till she found her free hand against his chest to stop from falling into his warm arms. She was crossed at herself that she fell in to what she thought was a trap and she started to panic but managed to stop the emotions from showing on her face but she couldn’t stop the emotions in time before the demon looked down into her eyes.

 

          When demon looked into her eyes he lost control, he bend forward to kiss her and closed his eyes. The angel was too surprised to do anything but glare at the demon angrily while she was pounding on what to say or do as the demon did not release her. She couldn’t gather her thoughts while she is in the demons arms. She felt lost and confused but she tried to hide it from him. The demon stopped the kiss, opened his eyes and looked down at her. He saw her feelings in her eyes and started cursing himself in his head for acting so foolishly and felt an irresistible urge to comfort her.

 

          By the time she opened her mouth to scold her and the demon had already lowered his head to hers and was nibbling on her lower lips. He tried to stop himself from acting so much of a fool but he couldn’t think straight. He could only register the feel of the angel against him. He lost his senses when the angel moaned against his lips and didn’t care that they were from different worlds. He only knew he wanted her to love him back and if that was not possible he would willingly give everything just to have her that just once.

 

The angel froze him then and there with what is left of her senses and control. She wanted him but she had to regain control and think what had drove her to kiss the demon. She left the side and called her phoenix. Trusting the phoenix to keep an eye on him, she walked over to the lake and threw aside her clothes. She didn’t care that it was in front of the demon and dived into the lake. She then swam over to the other side of the lake, where a tickle of cooling stream water flow into the lake from the mountain surrounding the pond.

 

          It was one of her favorite place in the lake as it had a rock which she can use as a chair as well as a cool tickle of drinkable water. She pound over what to do with the demon and realize with a start that she cared for him more then she admit to herself earlier on. She knew that they couldn’t live together as they weren’t from the same realm. She took a long swim to clear her head and to stop the aching and longing for the demon. After a while she realized that it won’t go off so she called to her phoenix and both of them flew back to heavens where she belonged.

 

She continued living as normal pretending that day didn’t happened. She thought of it only at night, when she couldn’t help it and dreamt of the demon. The harden demon who hopefully didn’t fall in love with her. She hoped that he didn’t fall in love but her heart would break at the thought of him not loving her back.

 

Reviews

[tynamite]

This story is really good. I get all the imagery and you're really good at describing things. This is too much. I've favourited it.

[Arya_the_elven_lady]

Continue the story! I like love stories. And I spot Romeo and Julliet in this too.

[Roxie Demonia]

i like it alot

[Megan Melindy]

I agree very much with Acheron's review. I feel that after this I'm left with lack of caring and concern for the characters. Or perhaps this stems from how I think this story does not need a sequel. It has a complete feeling, after reading it there is a sense of satisfaction. And I guess I do feel satisfied by this ending, rather tragic in a way, a vague Romeo and Juliet sort of set up, of two people from different worlds who cannot be together. That being said, that I feel satisfied after reading this, you have done your job as an author ^^

Furthermore, I noticed the lack of dialogue. Perhaps even a little here and there would improve the tale. Instead of telling us that the characters are "this" or "that", cocky or witty; let them show us that, through their actions and speech.

Overall, a good tale ^_^ Take care! And keep writing!

[Sheri]

You're right. This really doesn't need a sequeal. However, it is one of those stories which is written in such a way that when the reader does spy a Part 2, they want to read it. Even if it is just to see what happens with the characters. I like the way you wrote it. Sometimes you don't need dialouge to explain what the character's are thinking (even though I use it quite frequently in my writing). Anyway, keep up the good work!

[Niko Azazel]

i agree with the other comments when they say it has a nice flow but alas i'm not feeling. no offense. it doesn't feel like there's very much emotion behind it. i get the story line, it's a very nice story line, but there's no dialogue, no expression i guess you could say. it sounds kinda like a really long explanation. no offense again. like your trying to explain something without actually knowing what you're talking about. stories like this need to have emotion in them. you have to want to make the reader feel what you and/or your character(s) are feeling. see what you and/or your character(s) is seeing. trust me when i say i'm not trying to offend you. i do like this story but it feels fake. now i'm not saying my story(s) are any better, cuz i don't feel they are, but they do have emotion in them. you want your reader to care about ypur character(s) the same way you should care about them. you want who ever is reading this to cry when your character(s) cries, laugh when they laugh, fall in love when they fall in love. make the person reading it sympathize and relate to what your putting your character(s) through. throw in some dialogue, add some emotion, really try and put yourself in you character(s) shoes and ask yourself 'okay, now what would they do?' if you treat your character(s) like they are living breathing people you will get better results with your stories and eventually you'll notice that certain charaters begin to take on a life of their own per se. OMG!!! i just rambled your head off. i'm so sorry *blush* anyways, there's my advice for this story and any other story you or one of your friends or anyone really could us. i'm sorry again for rambling.

[MarieCo214]

there were a few grammatical errors, but other than that, I liked the flow. It's good.

[Christy Hauck]

I noticed a few grammatical errors, such as you used 'pound' instead of 'ponder' when you meant to. Other then that, I liked how you set it up to have a sequeal, but doesn't need one.

[Fades]

Sigh... where is part two. I love mythology and folklore but i leave them to those who writes them bast, and will await for more of your writing.