Lost yet at home

Lost yet at home:

When it starts to seam ok

 And you see your dreams came true

And your worst nightmares has disappeared

But you still don’t know what to do.

 

When your heart is simply broken

Though it was never this way

And you don’t have any places

But you just want to run away

 

All the time you feel alone

Frozen, broken, and insecure

But you’re still stuck in that place

And as much as you have to

You still don’t want to go

 

You’re just about this close to cry

But you can’t you don’t even know why

You’re shaking, so scared, and cold

You feel week, still act to strong

Reviews

[Tai Ryens]

I particularly like that you portray four different variants of lost emotions: the absence of misery but the inability to know what to do because all you've ever done is fight off demons, the trapped feeling when all you want to do is run, the unwillingness to depart when you have within you full knowledge that it's the healthiest thing to do, and the acting strong even when the world falls apart around you. All of them have the same feeling in common, although they portray wholly different things . . . I like this.

[Cara]

thank you, and glad you liked it ^_^

[Nusquam Esse]

Just a few minor typos,
Seem instead of Seam, and Okay instead of ok
Nightmares has, use have instead of has
And use Weak instead of Week.
And finally use Act Too instead of Act To.

All in all, this had a good flow to it.

[Cara]

thanks, and sorry about the mistakes >.

[Nusquam Esse]

No worries, they are things that a spellchecker is likely to miss (just wrong form of words). I am presuming you are not a native speaker, so it is understandable. And I could read this just fine, so no worries! Just trying to give feedback that would help beyond a mere, "I like this, good write"

[Cara]

thank you and you are right i'm not a native speaker, but i'm doing my best to neal it ^_^

[JohnRili]

It seems to peirce a hole trough my heart...
Anyways... Nice Writing. Keep up the good work!!

[Cara]

thank you ^_^

[EileenMarie]

This struck a cord with me! Very emotional... If I am wrong I am sorry but the second paragraph, Hart should be heart.
NIce write!!

[Cara]

thanks ^_^ and you are not wrong sorry about that :3