Dear Santa

Santa Claus

123 Candy Cane Lane

North Pole

Dear Santa,

I realize you are a little busy this time of year. I respect your time, so I’ll try to keep it short.

I was wondering, if there is a way, you may bring an unusual gift to me this year? Understand, this may be out of your league, but, my daughter needs a new brain. The old one doesn’t seem to work anymore. The light doesn’t turn on, it started having brain farts about 14 months ago and has gotten progressively worse. I tried shaking it up a little and still no change. When she first received said brain, it worked perfectly, but came without a warranty. This concerned me greatly, but I was told that no brain was guaranteed. I took it in to have some work done on it, and it seemed to run just fine after that.

But 14 months ago, my daughter met an ex-con, drug-addict, thief, momma’s boy who has ran her brain into the ground. The light went out about 6 months ago and I haven’t been able to get it to work right since. The aforementioned person gave her things to "expand" her mind, and it made things worse. Now, she is ready and willing to follow said person to live in the street, since we had to kick IT out due to stolen items and lack of food to feed the human garbage disposal.

It has become clear to me that, we may have gotten a "lemon" in the brain department and wondered if there was some return policy on brain over 18 years old. She is 19 and it’s just stopped working. Is there anything you can do to help?

Anxiously awaiting your reply,

Sandra

Reviews

[TLK]

The neurological conundrums of teenagers, huh.