Fight Me

Fight Me

A Poem by ShaneBerry
"

Lets Do This!

"
Fight Me
From across the Lot he glared at my friend,
on a good note i knew this night wouldn't end.
He walks up to her and spins her around,
alcohol on his breath.
I shout,
Waking the misery.
FIGHT ME!
Or leave now.
FIGHT ME!
I wont back down!
FIGHT ME!
For glory!
FIGHT ME!
For honor!
For a piece of my flesh!
STRIKE ME!
To Hurt me!
Lets see if i can bleed!
Back off!
Get away!
TAKE ME!
Lets see!
If your man enough to go toe to toe!
FIGHT ME!
TAKE ME!
Strike me to the cold ground!
or watch me spin you head around!
As i stare at him bleeding on the ground i smile as i feel my eye swelling up from the bruise. I wrap my arm around her and we leave.

© 2010 ShaneBerry


Author's Note

ShaneBerry
a bar fight can be nasty, thank you billy for pissingme off and makein me think of this lol

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Featured Review

i like it. :D maybe because im just naturally violent but i actually like this peice. no its not the best flow but i dont think it was meant to be a flowy write. it was brutal and yet funny beacause i could actually see this scene. great work here
Strike me to the cold ground!
or watch me spin you head around!


As i stare at him bleeding on the ground i smile as i feel my eye swelling up from the bruise. I wrap my arm around her and we leave.----- dude! loved that part! :D 1000!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

wow!tremendis amount of imagery.

Posted 13 Years Ago


The imagery in this is amazing! This whole piece is brilliantly captivating and the way it speaks and reads with so much emotion filled my soul. This was an incredible read and I really enjoyed it, thank you for sharing this!
-Cathrine

Posted 13 Years Ago


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you provide the imagery of a horrible encounter, well penned

Posted 13 Years Ago


I really like this poem...The end made me chuckle...I'm not sure if thats a good thing :]
IDK about the others but I understood it pretty well.

Posted 13 Years Ago


"or watch me spin you head around!" I think you meant 'your' XD The ending is shaky, try changing it up, it doesn't really work for the way this poem is. You can try shifting the format or just rewriting it, I just think it's kind of abrupt for this kind of poem, know what I mean? Anyways, I liked this, nice work :3

Posted 13 Years Ago


A cool write. Unique format. I like it.

Posted 13 Years Ago


Awesome!

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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r
This is awesome. Really gets the anger across.

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

It was a bit..confusing at first; but I actually really like this one. :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


Very nice... defending a lady's honor... keeping her safe.

I love the narrative quality to this piece and the raw anger. It's nice to know that people still take a hit for a friend.. female or otherwise.

I only hope neither participant was hurt too badly...haha

Loved it - Excellent work :)

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Stats

1102 Views
33 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 1, 2010
Last Updated on August 1, 2010
Tags: fight, war, choas, battle, martial arts, ninja, bar fight, shane berry

Author

ShaneBerry
ShaneBerry

denton, TX



About
My Chemical Romance “The Ghost of You” Name: Shane Douglas Berry Age: Born on 8/4/1992 Hair color: Brown Eye color: Green Skin color: White, Freckled Tattoos: Oroborus (red, center.. more..

Writing
Original Original

A Poem by ShaneBerry



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