LIBERTY MY DREAM

A poem

LIBERTY MY DREAM

 

Upon the sea I float

Never thinking of a shore

Like a w***e in the sea of morality

I float hoping not for a tomorrow

 

In the wind I fly

Like a dry leaf freed from life

Declining the greenness of tree

I am that freedom of dispassion

 

In the rain I dissolve

Like a lump of mud

That succumbs to rain drops

I release myself from bonds

 

Liberty you are my dream

You are my destination

Relentlessly I strive

To embrace thee before death

It will not be too long

Wait I am coming..

Let me throw away....

These shackles once I cherished..

Not knowing that they are shackles.

Wait I am coming...

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Dinesh Sairam]

Very much reminded me of Shelly's 'Mutability':

We are the clouds that veil the midnight moon;
How restlessly they speed, and gleam, and quiver,
Streaking the darkness radiantly!--yet soon
Night closes round, and they are lost forever:

Or like forgotten lyres, whose dissonant strings
Give various response to each varying blast,
To whose frail frame no second motion brings
One mood or modulation like the last.

We rest.--A dream has power to poison sleep;
We rise.--One wandering thought pollutes the day;
We feel, conceive or reason, laugh or weep;
Embrace fond foe, or cast our cares away:

It is the same!--For, be it joy or sorrow,
The path of its departure still is free:
Man's yesterday may ne'er be like his morrow;
Nought may endure but Mutability.

This poem is far more philosophical than it at first seems. It's about the period in youth when we thinking we are as free as anything, suddenly hit a fullstop. And I'm glad this piece of yours brought me back this poem. I think you kept it together in all but the last stanza. Consider re-writing it.

PS. Shelley always wanted to be known a liberate poet. It's ironic that he's known only for his romantic pieces.

Keep writing.

[Buddhistboy73]

Really enjoyed your words here, the flow is great....the imagery you conjure up is fantastic...the reader is taken along on the ride of your words...the first stanza particularly for me conjures up freedom...."like a w***e in the sea of morality"...love it!
and then again in the final stanza...it hits home...great write!

[Sweets]

Great job!
I loved it

[Daniel Gardner]

Nice job. I like the last stanza. We really believe that the little freedom we have is true freedom but it really is shackles. Great job

[Fran Marie]

a powerful impact of freedom and feel good piece, nicely crafted

[Dream Weaver]

Everyone should have at least a taste
of freedom, but are we all truly free?
Nicely put....

[.]

this is strong and liberating! Uplifting..I don't think that you needed to use the thee word..it doesn't seem to fit the tone of the poem..

[.]

i love the freedom & theme in the last few lines they are especially pertinent :)

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[Coyote Poetry]

Liberty is a powerful words. To have freedom and liberty is something not appreciated till we can lose it. I like the logic in the word. In some places people in this world thirst for freedom of choice and belief. I like the complete poem. The ending was very good. A excellent poem.
Coyote