I got tricked.

Them media really do be trickin us huh?

It never really occurred to me how gripping loneliness can be.

 

You never feel it until it’s already looming over you, when everything is already gone, when you’re the only one left.

Its murky tendrils shoot out from the shadows of your room, excited for its next inmate.

And no matter how much you try to get away, the damnable thing keeps creeping back in to swallow you whole.

 

And you’ll know it already has you, for everything will begin to feel meaningless. The job, the house, cleanliness, none of them will concern you. Instead, you’ll be concerned how lonely you are, to the point of you make friends with this horrible being and feel good about this new buddy of yours as you continuously lament how sad you are.

 

The worst part? It feels GOOD.

 

Now I’ve heard stories stating how being alone can you make you strong, that all you need is a breathing technique, a meditation procedure, a mindful approach but they forgot one important detail.

 

There is a difference between wanting to be alone and not having any choice BUT to be alone. Nobody wants to sit an hour breathing in and out while almost all of your classmates are having their wedding night and nobody wants to be mindful about their steps when you know that phone you have been ignoring all day contain images and posts that screams how much life you’re missing out on.

 

Terrible, I got tricked into believe that I’m strengthening myself when I’m actually diving deeper into ocean. I want to get out, I want to stop feeling this way, I don’t want to keep looking at this sharped-teethed Megalodon that tells me how fun it is to be alone and how it wants to be friends.

 

Hello… Please help… I am under the water.

Author's Note

Thanks for dropping by!

Reviews

[Davidgeo]

I think making friends with yourself is most important, that starts by not holding yourself to irrelevant standards. It's easier to participate in civilization that way. Trying to worry about others that aren't directly and materially involved in our lives is a waste of psychic energy. But don't feel alone, I think we all feel something like this at all times to varying degrees. Circumstances beyond our control can make it worse but they can also help you see things others won't be able to. There is gold in the struggle, it's just harder to mine. You should llstent to two songs, "I Like Wine" by Adele and "Learn to Live With What You Are" by Ben Folds. You will feel less tricked afterward... probably. This might be a trick.

[Spoinkeru]

Thanks friend! Have a nice day and good vibes all around.