Vibrations in the Observations of an Acid Head

The cord

is a tail

to the chair

It strings our voices

into the walls

Shadows scream in

in twisted shapes

They echo

They echo

silent pleas

A silence
that shakes
our
reality
loose

Everything is melting

into
    scarlet glue

The carpet
unyielding

to
infinitesimal flames

Bedrock.

Whispers given

none received

Alone? Yes.

No...

A shadow shifts.

Mine? No.

Yes?

Tumbling spoken things

crawling towards the gyprock

That animal
staring

smiles like the face
that belonged to my head

yesterday...
or was it last year?

Reviews

[Plagued Monumentally]

I've always been a fan of that gray background you use (was it you that always had that in your poems? Not sure, but anyways). I never would of guessed this was a concrete poem if OT hadn't said anything. :P I really liked how you used all those interesting words like: "infinitesimal flames", "unyielding", and "scarlet glue". I thought those were really thought out and creative and they made the poem that much better to read.

My favorite lines would have to be either:
"Whispers given
none received"

or

"That animal
staring
smiles like the face
that belonged to my head"

Those stood out to me the most because they had an eerie feeling about them when I read it. The poem was very nicely done, and I couldn't expect less from you. Thank you for the read request, it was definitely not a waste of my time.

[Inyourshadow]

Shadows scream in
in twisted shapes

and sometimes they reveiw the poem lol, love this piece the imagery and the darkened undertones tearing the fabric of the norm to shreds, love the discriptive twisted nature of your words, so many great quotes to make one think. Loved it did I say that already, keep em' coming ~ Shadow

[Alskar]

This felt like an acid trip. Perhaps partly because of the layout, and because of the vagueness of the content. It was a bit mystifying, to say the least. I got that it was dark, but I didn't quite get what the basic premise was. Maybe there isn't one, and it is just the random inner workings of a dark, confused mind. Which would be a very interesting idea. It felt like a sinister trip through Underland.

[roy mccarthy]

wow,very different from the usual poems on here,but really awesome,
i liked how you wrote it out!
made it unique!

Mystifying.
It made me think of a mixture between schizophrenia and claustrophobia.
Quite the interesting write with an exceptional choice of words.
The questions he seemed to ask himself in the poem made you think and ask yourself; leaving something to ponder. Thanks for the read request.

[Carrion.]

this really stands out. i love it:D

[Caradoc]

Very interesting. I haver never read an abstract poem before to my knowledge. One of the things I liked best about this poem was the format, the way each line moved down and to the side. It was like as I read I was falling into the scenes described by your poem. I wonder at those infinitessimal flames...

[Becky C Strukamp]

I love the structure of this poem, it goes well with the wording. Excellent write.

[Tainted Devotion]

Wow I like this very much. It's something new that I've come across. The layout of the poem caught my attention drastically, and I found myself becoming lost in the words. Your broad vocab use was splendid. I loved how this poem flowed so well. The gray background that you use, the one that has been mentioned by other writers, is something that I too have liked. Keep at it. You're really good. :)

[Lily Mae]

Oh, I love this.. well laid out and exciting.. Feels like yesterday:) xx

[Megan]

Wow talk about observations of an acid head..I think I should show this to my friend Jimbo, this would make perfect sense to him! I do love the first few stanzas of this write. Everything is phrased unexpectedly..but I guess that's what you get when you read an abstract poem. This is truly brilliant though and I enjoyed reading it..I plan to share it with Jimbo!! :)