The Unicorn is not For Sale

Anecdote

On a particularly boring day, we were cruising some back roads looking for something interesting to see or do. We spot in the distance a goat pen with a most unusual occupant. The little guy was standing on the hill in profile and it looked for all the world that he had only one horn. So we did what any bored partners would do, we got out and went to see. We pulled the ambulance to the side of the road, flipped on the emergency lights, for safety, of course, and started calling the little guy for a better look. As he approached tentatively, we confirmed that he did, indeed have only one horn. He was a tiny pygmy billy goat with a stunning horn spiraling from the dead center of his tiny head. He was the most precious thing we had ever seen. We tried to coax him closer with juicy grass tidbits. He was almost over to us when his head came up and he bounded away. 

We hear a gravelly voice echo across the pen with a deep barely understandable uneducated drawl, "Ma'am. Ma'am!!! I'm sorry, the unicorn is not for sale!" We startled and turned toward the source of this unexpected interruption to our fact finding mission to see this wild haired gentleman wearing partially unsecured overalls, no shirt, no shoes, with a girth that is a rival for a small mountain.

I replied, "Unicorn?" What the hell??? I thought. 

"Sir, we were admiring the little guy. Not looking to take him or anything."

He drawls on, "Yep, he's got hisself one of them generic defects we's tryin to repopligate so's we c'n sell 'em on E-bay as Mystical Craetures.  We's gonna say theys straight from them Harry Potter movies. We's gonna say they's excaped."

Repopligate??? Really??? What is he trying to say?  Oh yeah...A genetic defect he is attempting to repeat then sell to the highest bidder. I work really hard to hold onto the laughter until I am a safe distance from this mountain before I exploded.

"Ah. OK" I cautiously reply as we attempt to return to the relative safety of our ambulance so we can die laughing.  

I just want a life where the first thing out of my mouth gets to be, "The unicorn is not for sale."

We got back in the ambulance, shut off the lights and have had weeks of enjoyment of that particular memory. The day, of course, deteriorated from there but it wasn't so bad because we had some laughter to carry us through.