Monday Mourning

Monday Mourning

A Poem by tbwdtw

Oh, my Love, I pray this isn't real.

I cannot for a moment stand the way I feel.

I warned you, "Don't believe me".

How could you think me free?

I'm not free from this emptiness.

Now I'm dying of unfaithfulness.

 

Consumed by water,

Trapped by ground,

Under the stone is where I found

You, you need not grieve,

Just cease to breathe.

Find your peace in nonexistance.

 

Lonely, your entire life,

Now you're surrounded by ones you'll never know.

You would have been my wife.

Tonight, and for eternity, you sleep below.

 

 

© 2010 tbwdtw


Author's Note

tbwdtw
This is told from a man's point of view, not mine.
I would not pray and I would not marry a woman (yes, I'm a girl).

I'll probably edit this. I don't like it much. This is what I get for writing about something I can't relate to.

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Reviews

i really like it

Posted 13 Years Ago


It is about a suicide, Wicahpi Iyozaza.

And I'm thrilled people like my work! I honestly never thought I'd even be decent at poetry until I got some inspiration this weekend.

Posted 14 Years Ago


I like the beginning the A B C rhyme but the second and third paragraphs are absoulutely excellent for not relating to this piece you've wrote it pretty well and potrayed it from the man's point of view the way a man would view it . Thumbs up I really like your work. :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


Actually, I think it's about suicide and I can relate on that level.
This poem is a mix of traditional rhyme and free verse; I do that
some times, too. Not every one likes the mix; but that is how it flows
at at times. It's not all bad :)

Posted 14 Years Ago


You kinda lost me in a couple parts but this is a good write.

Posted 14 Years Ago


No! it's good! Since you say that you won't marry a woman, i hope you're a girl(one can't tell these days).Anyways, the poem is beautiful,not because of the point of view but because your skill shows here.Why don't you try your hand at pieces you feel about?

Posted 14 Years Ago



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6 Reviews
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Added on April 18, 2010
Last Updated on April 18, 2010

Author

tbwdtw
tbwdtw

IL



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