The Songstress

Her reticent eyes unfolded
Over a smile meekly creased
Across her smoothly rendered face
Her soft lips rarely cracking
Open save for a breathy whisper
That made me tremble with every word
Spoken in her voice that vibrated
While the piano keys became a distant
Echo of her present shape
Her form powerful in the rhythm
Overwhelming in the elegy
As if energizing every
Molecule I breathed in
As her song ascended
Its mournful glorious tragedy
Her delicate ineluctable eyes
Pulled me from my daze
Captured my essence through the
Space between us
The pearl necklace laying on her breast
Glistened in her stream of tears
Mingled with mine

Reviews

[Sophy Freebirds]

Your were lonely i was lonely,both our wounds became our each others cure. I really loved this piece the delicate way you have wrote it weave a magic through my eyes.. every word charging molecules- i simply loved that line. I could connect to it. So i think i've no other words to describe what i feel ;) Awesome.

~Sophy

[J. Land]

Thank you, Sophy. Your reviews are always astute and encouraging. I appreciate it.

[Briana O'Connor]

The is a very pulchritudinous expression of love and the vision we see before us, embracing the beauty that is the appearance and heart of another. Personally I would add some punctuation to better separate your phrases and make it easier to comprehend the flow of the elegant piece. Thank you for sharing this piece with us.

[Ashira Macy]

It is amazing how much another person can move us with their art. Singing is one of my only loves, and so this poem really touched me and brought me into it. You clearly had a deep connection with this melodious siren. Brilliant work.

[J. Land]

Thank you, Ashira. This one comes from a lifetime of love and appreciation for music and performance. I once was a vocal performance major, but, alas, I gave it all up to teach English. ;)

[Jack Wolfe]

Quite a vivid heart felt piece, 'while the piano keys became a distant echo,' this almost felt like I was watching a scene, and watching it pane-out then fade . . . of course, I have to nit-pick, or else it wouldn't be a full review. Line 2 through 4 you have stacking 'Y's' It didn't distracted from the piece, but I couldn't help but notice. Well done, and good to see you back.

[J. Land]

Thank you, Jack. The writing has been sporadic, but this comes from a really good place.