A Story by TJ

In the beginning, he pleaded for his life.


Now, he begs for his death.


Abraham said, "If you want to test a man's character, give him power.”


I say, if you want to test a man's character, give him pain.

© 2011 TJ

Author's Note

this is been bouncing around in my head for about a week now. i tried to let it fester until i came up with more to write, but it was giving me a headache.

to be continued...maybe?

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Featured Review

This has definitely been bouncing around in your head for a reason! Very creepy and as others have said, very chilling. You should really keep going with this, see where it takes you. Can't wait to read the character that you create who thinks along these lines, very scary. You definitely have something here, go with it!

Posted 9 Years Ago

2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


I like how the first line reminds the reader of Genesis I.I "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth" but heaven and earth become power and pain. I think your raising some important questions about what it takes to break a man and what that means about humanity, for both the sadist and prey (or alternatively willing masochist).

Posted 7 Years Ago

I received this read request much too long ago, but I do so hope you decided to continue building on this idea. If not, maybe it continues to percolate inside; I would read more.

Posted 8 Years Ago

It is a wonderful start. Makes all sorts of questions pop to mind.

Posted 9 Years Ago

So True.. Pain is the real divider of Men and Boys..

Posted 9 Years Ago

maybe to keep going, you coud describe some ways that bring a man pain... ya know?

Posted 9 Years Ago

Interesting. Pain. Good one. Power makes for difficult decisons because you have NUMEROUS capabilities. Pain makes most of us MAD. Both test the character. Thank you.

Posted 9 Years Ago

Nicely done. I agree with that. If you can not break someone through pain, then he has more character than the rest of us. Good job

Posted 9 Years Ago

That is a powerful concept and a hooking thought. You're right, if we want to test a man's character, give him pain. No matter how he seemed or not, how how he's living or not.
You'll make it through, i'm sure, and say go with this...

Posted 9 Years Ago

wow just keep going with this. I think you have something here!

Posted 9 Years Ago

sometimes ones charachter is defined by strength, sometimes by power, but there is something to be said for pain. so raw, so intense, so gripping. i can see so much more to come from this, if not sometimes alot can be said in a few short words. i enjoy reading your work very deep intersting mind

Posted 9 Years Ago

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89 Reviews
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on June 8, 2011
Last Updated on June 14, 2011



Virginia Beach, VA

My name is TJ and I'm still just your typical aspiring author :) Follow me on twitter @tj_coles And for some short stories in 140 characters or less follow @timmystales more..

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