Too Long

Found this poem I wrote years ago. Thought I'd share. Its always interesting to see how your own poetry evolves, not just in style but in theme as well.

Everything about you drives me up the wall

If I had to count the ways, I couldn't count them all

Our steps are not in sync, we don't see eye to eye

If I'm a bird you're a fish, I can't swim and you can't fly

If its not one thing its another, our conflicts are never ending

We're rarely ever happy, if we act like it we're pretending

The difference between what I want and what you don't

What I want is change and that’s something that you won't

Why try to compromise and settle for what we know is wrong

And draw out any longer what’s already gone on for too long

Reviews

[Mary Christabel George]

There is so much maturity i the write though you say it was written very long ago.
There has been a great writer out there since then.
You play with the words & write a thing that pierces one's heart.
You are one of the best writers whom I have known in WC & surely a Gifted writer.

Ma fav lines are -
"If I'm a bird you're a fish, I can't swim and you can't fly"
"Why try to compromise and settle for what we know is wrong"

[KeelyJane]

Thank you so much. I'm flattered.

[Mike Emil]

have we met before?
sounds like it
did I stiff you for the tab?
sorry
but tough on that

[Jonathan Biswell]

I like it

[MoriartyMesa]

Words that are not spoken but in a kiss. I think anyway.

[Jack...]

KJ, this was funny and cute and sad all at the same time. I loved the fish and the bird line

[Astro]

I like this one a lot. It may be older but the only thing I found fault with was the size of the text. It gives the form a sloppy look but the lines are excellent. Well done.

[Coyote Poetry]

A great song from the past. "Should I stay or should I go." The poem reminded me of the song. Sometime two people fall together and stay together in a turmoil and can survive. Nice flow of thoughts led the reader to a good ending. Thank you for the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Pete Langley]

It`s a nice theme, Keely, and yes, we all air old stuff....but I have to think you`ve learned a bit about scanning in a rhymed poem since the time you wrote this piece, so why not give it a whirl?....there are lots of ways you could balance the syllable count without changing either the rhyme scheme or the thought train. P.

[Baby Ricochet]

When did you meet my brother? Good rhymes.