weird heart

it's common to all...

our heart is very weird...
it attaches to anyone,
without thinking anything.

it don't see who it is
 or what it will cost
it neither think that the person
to whom it is going to attach loves you
 just it goes on attaching

whether the person opposite
don't even know who are you
but the heart just in the first sight
gets attached

whether u see him/her on t.v
or anywhere
your heart think this is made for you

you started dreaming of it
knowing very well that
the person about whom you are dreaming
will not be yours

you try to understand your heart
 but still
it just keeps on dreaming

and when that lovely dream breaks
the pain you feel
is the most painful pain
no one can imagine that pain
except u in the world

anyone of yours around you
tells that he/she
likes you

at the first time you ignore
but in the second time
your heart starts thinking about that
and then at the third it falls in love

but when you check the reality
your heart gets the news
 that it was all rumor

and then the world laughs at you
and you seem to be a fool in front of all
but that foolish heart
in the next time, repeats that mistake
and attaches to other person
because it is not in our control
neither ours and nor of our brain
because the heart is weird.......

Reviews

[Kevin Andros]

Well finally I got to this poem! It sure took me long but it was worth the wait. First of all, the best things about it.

The feelings and the scenarios in this poem is very real and very raw. The reader can at once latch on to this and read it till the end as it is so very true on so many levels. The intensity is very well described of what you call an 'attachment' of the heart. And once the heart wants something, it cannot be diverted, pushed, bribed or cajoled to not to like it. The write captures the essence of the heart very well.

Now few things that I would like to point out.

It is clear from your writing that you are very young and are writing your true emotions out on the computer but you need to go through it once more. There are many errors that really kills the description of the weirdness of the heart. You can loose many readers as the mistakes in the poems forces them to stop, go back and read again. One very important factor of writing a poem is that it should be very smooth, it should flow like a river right from the beginning to the end. Just pointing out one of the errors as an example. "It don't see who it is.." I think it would have flowed better if it was "it doesn't see who it is..."

Now I am not pretending to be an expert as I am not, but I just pointed out what jumped at me. If you want, I can help you go through this and proof read it.

However, this is a very good write and I would say you should keep writing and see the difference as you mature. And on this very topic you can read one of my piece titled "Tears from the heart". I can send you a read request if you want.

Keep writing,

Best,

~KA~
Ӝ∑Ʌ↑ἧ Ⱥἧƌʁɸ₴

[vaishnavi]

thank you i will make changes in it and to say you are a good reviewer i like ur reviews because they are en lighting me

[Kevin Andros]

you are very welcome...

[Bluefire]

The heart is a strange thing to have.
It pulls you along through live, making you feel pain or love, joy or sorrow.
I like the way you write, the word usage and pattern.
It's very unique.
Well done. ^^

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much :)

[Bluefire]

No problem. ^^

[1Disawsum]

great poem, quite true aha loved it!

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much :D

[Vidya Bacchus]

Very nice poem on our weird heart.The thing refuses to see reason lol

[vaishnavi]

yeah thx that u liked it :D

[Vidya Bacchus]

You are welcome :)

[Jennifer Paige]

I like this. I love that our hearts are weird! Well written as well

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much Jennifer Paige glad u liked it :D

[Ranger Kessel]

very nice...well written. thanks:)

[vaishnavi]

your welcome :D

[Ghost Writer]

This hasn't happened to me yet, but you make it sound awesome. You are an amazing writer.

[vaishnavi]

thank you am very glad that u liked it :D

[Eve Ola]

impressive n good write. I truly enjoyed !

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much i loved that u liked this it is work written by me with all my heart thanks a lot

[Eve Ola]

You are always welcome dear :)

[vaishnavi]

. :D

[Quinn]

Very nice poem, love how it's written and you can see the feelings throughout the piece. Well done.

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much much glad that u liked it thx for reading
plz share this piece of writting if possible :D

[Isadora Swift]

Nice poem. Not one of my favourite forms and not a fan on the topic but despite this you managed to pull me right in with it! Well written and congrats on a lovely poem!

[vaishnavi]

thank you very much
much glad that u liked it thx for reading
plz share this piece of writting if possible :D