Reckless Turmoil

Having to realize your shortcomings .

               Reckless Turmoil     
I need no enemy to fell me,
For the only hand at my throat is my own,
I am my nemesis in every disguise,
I never recognize what I love until I cast it away,
And my heart realizes it aches,
For what was....

 

I took you for granted because,
There was never a time,
Your breath didn't merge with mine,
So I didn't know how that would be,
Until you were gone and my heart splintered,
And shattered into a million shards.

 

I would give it all up,
Every reckless show of defiance,
To hold you once more,
You were my solace,
Even when I thought,
I was a law unto myself.

I needed a harbour,
To shelter me from the storm,
That rages in my soul,
Forever violent,never dormant.
Consuming me in its ferocity,
I needed you to temper me.

But I didn't know and ran you to the ground,
Burying you in my turmoil,
Always you were there to pull me from the abyss,
I turned a blind eye to your sacrifices,
Your tears of blood shed in my name,
But now you are gone.

 

And I feel what you felt,
Caught up in a whirlwind of despair,
Witness to the destruction I wreaked,
Sired by my demons that ride me,
Like a wild stallion unleashed,
Stampeding and destroying all in my path.

 

Author's Note

Please be kind.

Reviews

[Rocans]

Great poem, the stanzas literally just got better and better, until it culminated in an excellently written final stanza, enjoyed this thoroughly.
Caught up in a whirlwind of despair,
Witness to the destruction I wreaked,
Sired by my demons that ride me,
Like a wild stallion unleashed,

Those line were epic to me.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you very much.

[Lyn Anderson]

It is a beautiful poem, with a lot of pain. I totally get this, and why a person who has been broken then turns around and does the breaking, even when they don't mean to. You use punctuation effectively, for the most part. The second line could probably do without the first comma, and "And shattered, making me bleed" might be somehow reworked - perhaps Shattering it till it bled? Something slightly less staccato? Anyway, either way it is a gorgeous verse threaded with emotion.

[Vidya Bacchus]

I felt this too about the line but nothing else came to mind.I will surely think on it and perhaps write it differently.Thank you KL.

[Praveeta]

Quite often we do not realise the value of a person until it is too late. Nicely penned, creative friend.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Much thanks my friend:)

[Praveeta]

You are most welcome.

[Avinash]

We all have ignored someone who had truly loved and cared for us. It is another matter that worth of most of the things are realized when they are gone. Here the poem although written in despair over all gives a beautiful picture of a love long lost and redemption.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Much thanks Avinash you have hit the nail on the head .

[Vidya Bacchus]

Vidya Vista, my darling of future, and example of love, here I see you writing about such deep things, and I love to see / read this deep side of you. For the only hand at my throat,is my own, And I am Nemesis... Nemesis is a thing I wrote about too, you should find out in time, when you're traveling through my library, and it is nothing at all to compare to these words....
We only often (do know true love) by not knowing it yet darling... it's a spell, a vampire bliss, a kiss, a often not tortured diss, but yet, a feeling, a pearl we shouldn't embrace.. for it has futures meanings, we don't may touch, (yet).

Then I like your line: " Forever violent,never dormant." and with that line I think, there's nobody who should temper you, for you're pretty strong yourself. :) the contradiction in that line, already says so :)

Some loves, and great friends love, leave us, but know in heart, they are helping themselves, they are getting stronger maybe to come back ones in a life time, maybe reborn into phoenixes, or just as their newer selves. And we should let them have that space, for love is letting go, and you and me, know, that that's art.... I loved this fantastic deep piece of writing my dear friend. 100/100

- Elisa

[Vidya Bacchus]

I am speechless at this wonderful review my sweet friend.Your words are poetry in themselves.Thank you so much as ever your words touch my heart and make me happy.Yes sometimes they have to leave if only to figure out how to come back stronger to us.Yours Vidya Vista :)

No way, your words are, I'm just your transmitter of love and happiness you give others. Truly. What I review, is based on what you do (to me). :) smiling here. Love you friend xx

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you Elisa I am smiling most happily.Love you too hon :)

I'm a happy woman if I made Vidya Vista smile :) nothing more I wish for :) xx and hugs to the caribbean!!! :D

[Vidya Bacchus]

Awww hugs to you too :)

Have a great morning luv :) enjoy your nice weather... I hope? x

[Vidya Bacchus]

Have a wonderful day too my sweet friend :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"took it all for granted, but how was i to know, that you'd be letting go--and it cuts like a knife" (bryan adams)

oh yes, this poem can teach us...i was this speaker once, and for years regretted it.

good piece of poetry that stirs the memory.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you Jacob your words are always appreciated.

[SAYED THANGAL]

the real ebb and flow of life revealed in the poem, appreciating the work.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Much thanks Sayed .

[Saddam]

much shortcome....much inner feeling.....much love....I love this....ah...nice by your pen. Thanks for sharing. loveya.

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you Ssadd :)

[writ rajat]

very piece of writing and very good thought

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thanks Writ :)

[Lucy Morningstar &heart..]

This was really wonderful; thanks for sending me the read request :D

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you very much Lucy :)

[Lydia Shutter]

Indeed, we all have shortcomings, but realizing them is quite different from beating yourself up about them. We are often our own worst critics. Mistakes are made in life and some can not be remedied. Hopefully we can learn from them...and that is what is very important. The regret is honest and strong throughout your poem. I hope you are able to move forward. Lydi**

[Vidya Bacchus]

Thank you Lydi :)