(15) Dear Mister Death

Dear Mister Death,

My name is Jimmy and I'm only six
I am upset, everything is in a fix
My Daddy is working so far away
He is a soldier, please keep him safe today

Thanking you

Jimmy


Dear Jimmy,

Thank you for writing, but there's nothing I can do
Your Daddy won't be coming home to you
He was killed today, fighting the enemy

I'm so sorry but he will be coming to me

Apologies

Death


Dear Mister Death,

I'm begging you, please let Daddy come home
Spare his life, you can have my own
Mummy is going to have my baby brother
Mummy and Daddy really need each other

Yours

Jimmy


Dear Jimmy,

Okay then, I know how you must feel
I will visit tonight for you to sign the deal
Yes, I will allow your Daddy to be fine
But I'm sorry Jimmy, you are now mine

See you soon

Death

copyright
Chris Smith 2010

Reviews

[M.Babu]

How you've arranged this piece is just so unique and thoughtful my friend!

If only we could all write letters to calm Death and make different deals! Very sad at the end how the Boy perished for his Dad though:) Well structured with that brilliant flow you always possess Chris!
Loved this part the most:

"I'm begging you, please let Daddy come home
Spare his life, you can have my own
Mummy is going to have my baby brother
Mummy and Daddy really need each other"

MAGNIFICENT!!

[.]

charming death does it again..I will swap with Jimmy!!! bless him!

[Chris Smith Welshpoetcs]

Thank you everyone for the great comments.

[Helen]

I'll never get tired of reading this one Chris :-) Bravo!

[Embryonic Exorcist]

I usually dislike rhyming poems, but in this case, I wouldn't have it any other way :D Really brings out Jimmy's childish innocence. I like that Death's letters all rhyme as well but obviously are more ominous. I've never read something like this. This is original art! Fantastic :)

[Kiri Nells]

Brilliant! I know I'd never want any letter to me to be signed, "See you soon, Death" that would freak me out. Of course, then I'd write a poem or story and everything would be a-okay....ish. Well done!
See you soon,
Kiri
(nah, doesn't have the same effect)

[chillz]

hello there
I just wanted to say....BRILLIANT WORK
was an Amazing piece
A new fan
Chillzxxx

[Jeremy Wyatt]

Bloody hell. started like a letter to Santa, then whack! Hard hitting stuff Chris, brill..

[Lily Mae]

Crazy intense..wow. I love it Chris.. :) x

[Magdelena]

Wow! This says allot. I like the way you brought this forth. The format was excellent.

Wonderful images, and how Jimmy is offering himself to 'Death' you made me feel his pain and yet his profound sacrifice too.

Mags xx