(70) Demon's Brew

Bar tender, pour me another drink
For within this dank pity I wallow
Fill the whiskey full to the brink
So I can drown away my sorrow

Once, I was a man able to keep my cool
Never one for the rage to over take me
But bad times came and made me a fool
I allowed anger to always leave me empty

Come, I want you to fill my glass once again
I will be the one who decide when enough is enough
I want to swallow up when times were good, back then
Because now this life has become much too tough

Then fury visits me and his glass I hurl and smash
Unsteady on my feet I find my way out the door
People try to keep away, as at them I will lash
So now going home, I find myself crawling on the floor

Once inside, I will open another bottle to begin anew
They try to say I have a problem, and they are wrong
I can stop drinking, I can give up this Demon's brew
Because this man is able to stand and be strong

But in reality, I can not sleep for my spirit is weak
I say I need no one, because I fear my own shame
I want to stay drunk, because then I need not speak
I scream at the world when I know that I am to blame



copyright Chris Smith 1998

Author's Note

I battled with my Demons, I was one of the lucky ones and won.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

A friend, a dear friend who'd been a druggie for quite a while but had grappled his way out, said, 'I did what I wanted because there was no friggin' alternative - then i opened my eyes .. all I have to do now is stay alive.'

He's dead now.

Great and brave writing here .. takes strength to write like this. Keep strong

[M.Babu]

"Bar tender, pour me another drink
For within this dank pity I wallow
Fill the whiskey full to the brink
So I can drown away my sorrow " This was absolutely magnificent! What a great way to start a piece. It grabbed me by the eyes (xD) and didnt let go. Well done!

We all have such dark periods in time. and Getting through them takes courage, strength and perserverance. I applaud you for pulling through the turbulence and sharing this with us Chris. Truly touching and well confessed.

[Lily Mae]

Those damn demons try hard and put up a fight.. But in seeing your great spirit and life Chris and with all you've gone through in this life..you will always win... :) xx great write.. xx

[Murtuza]

Such a fantastic poem can only come from you! I like the way you've interpreted the feelings in this write and how you've let the emotions flow. You are an inspiration and I'm glad you won the war.

[Amy Bumpas]

Glad you won and not your demons. Drinking is so easy to
do, but then the next day the same sadness again. So many
lose their battle, and don't want to admit they do have a
problem. So, congratulations again:))

[Althelia Marie Caine]

This is a very good poem. It gives light to our inner demons

[iamkim]

what a wonderful piece of art! you have written it with strong emotions. i love how the lines flowed from the very beginning till the last line. it's simply one of the best poems i have ever read!

[hopelove]

i love your strong fellings

[SpokenWord]

Demons can get to anyone, at times it seems that it is easier to find comfort in a bottle or a drug that makes us forget our responsibilities to ourself and others. It seems impossible to find a way out but once out I believe we look back and realzie that we could have escaped when ever we chose too. I like this poem as it shows the shallow bravery to do as one pleases but then shows the true fear behind the actions. Nicely done.

[Ruth]

Intoxication is misubderstood! I know too well the flaws of which you speak, I am glad you managed to reign triumphant love, a lot of people don't! This is an honest write and one that leaves the reader feeling the emotion within it! xx

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

having been the daughter, bride, mother of those who have experienced the same battles~I am truly greatful for an inside perspective from the other side of the experience~ thank you