Wind of change

However heavy my heart may be,

And my further weighted soul,

At least my spirit is still free,

Though still I am not quite whole.

 

I see the falcons circling above,

I have tasted the morning dew,

I sent out my own white dove,

For the start of something new.

 

For all my errors that I irked,

And the times that I have sinned,

I never knew how faith worked,

Or to accept the changing wind.

Reviews

[Barbara Walker]

I really like the concept of this poem, but the flow isn't real smooth. If you tried changing the words around just a little it might help the flow?
Though heavy my heart may be
and heavy is my soul,
at least my spirit is still free,
though I am not quite whole.
In the second stanza, third line, maybe-I have sent out my own white dove.
The third stanza is where I really had trouble with the reading. I think it's that word, irked. How about-
About me, my errors lurk
and many times I've sinned,
but I never knew how faith would work
or how to accept the changing wind. (????)
You get the idea, I'm sure you can do better than I. I really do like the premise. Barbara

[Cats Eye]

Intersting write, it is a little hard to comprehend though, I enjoyed reading this piece, it was very authentic.