the pond

His love wallows deep beneath the trenched ponds.

Swamped and sunken is my heart.

Yet the sweet melodies of drifting jays call to him.

But I, I stay drowning among the veils of time.

 

He makes me so furious,

His haughty manner resembles that of giants crushing delicate petals.

I  question, why I ever fell for those strong jaws and rusty face,

Were they eyes that sucked me in, or massively gravitational black holes.

 

Vehemence , malevolence spill through my pores, my gaping sockets.

Fuming with hatred, I fidget on the border between anger and passion.

 

Stealing from me the very sense of myself.

You did, but in it you have left me void and wanting.

For that, I thank you, this burn that envelopes the ridges of my torn heart feels…good.

Pain is no longer feared but refreshing. Suffering has become pleasure.

 

The summer passes, the pond dries, Fall leaves linger

Winter my heart freezes, Spring she thaws.

Yet time is the only force which escapes the cycles of life.

Time is the only tyrant who triumphs, the heart claims victory.

& I overcome all that shall lie before me.  

Reviews

[MoonlitAngel]

Very good. The detail was vivid and welcoming, and the description was wonderful. I loved it all. One thing to look at though;
The second paragraph doesn't flow very well. I would suggest either shortening lines 2, 3, and 4 or lengthning line 1. Otherwise, very good. Keep writing :)

--blood