Clouds

Burdened velvety clouds , rising to fall. .

 

Moaning and groaning silently , 

painting the bliss before storm.

 

Enigmatic blanket around ,

 

disguising mystic laborious agents ,

 

they rummage through heaven and hell,

 

to gather crystal drops---

 

ornaments of green bride ,

 

gold-painted cloud , suffused with red,

 

silvery cracking filly, imparting the final touch.

 

Burdened velvety clouds , rising to fall. .

Reviews

[DaniElle LaPointe]

Nice imagery Yusef ;)

[Leslie Philibert]

Like this, the perfect opening image that uses two apparently contradictory images to great effect, then the anthromorphic second verse, loads to enjoy here, well done.

[Erinne S.]

This was such a beautiful way to describe clouds :) I loved it and your word pictures to make everything come alive and become so vivid for the reader to picture. Another fabulous poem :)

~Erinne

[yusuf]

Thank You So Much!

[DIVYA]

Wow Yusuf...you did it again. Such a different subject presented with such effective imagery. I can almost see the clouds forming...and rising. One thing though... As the clouds are painting the bliss before the storm, they would be better of rumbling or humming and not moaning and groaning as that indicates sort of pain a bit. But you decide...
Overall a very endearing poem. Keep giving us more...Divya

[yusuf]

Thank You So Much Divya! I am glad and obliged! :)
I think a storm could also come with emotions laden with moaning and groaning. ;)

[DIVYA]

Yes..a storm would be well associated with the subject words :)

[Dark Butterfly]

wow this is crazy good, the beauty of dimise, i just love the line "rising to fall" its so reflective of all life not just the clouds!

[yusuf]

Thank You So Much! I am glad that you got the depth of my words! I am honored by your visit!

[LouieBee]

You've given clouds such character in this poem. Lovely choice of words. 'Silky' smooth ;) Another great one man. Keep it up!

LB

[yusuf]

Thank You for your encouragement brother! i am glad by your visit!

[DrD]

Stark imagry characterizes this work and forces us to visualize its content. Well constructed and planned, I liked reading this very much.

[yusuf]

thank you so much sir! i am honored by your visit!

[rnuff]

A very well written write.
Much enjoyed

[yusuf]

Gracias!Glad you did!

[luviva]

wow... what a great write!! i had never thought of them that way but you totally change my mind now

[yusuf]

thank you! i am glad you liked it! :)

[luviva]

u r welcome...