Everything is grey to me

A poem dealing with depression

Everything Is Grey To Me

Sitting here writing about feelings that aren't measurable

feelings that don't exist in a real world

A bleak body of life 

A beating corpse

A dead smile

A depressed soul

I am the happy one you all know,

the one with a Cheshire like grin

always laughing, always telling jokes
these are the good days 

before the storm arrives

before my former self is a mirage 

in this grey world.

There doesn't have to be a cause

I won't expect you to understand

I will battle this on my own

no drugs will hold my hand.

Forgive my attitude 

my gormless glare, 

a shell of my former self

A shadow in a chair,

It's possible to smile,

even share a laugh

inside I'm pining 

for my other half, 

She hasn't done anything wrong

I want her to understand 

I need to get myself better

I need her helping hand, 

I've never known something so ferocious 

to rip out a living soul,

to one day make a world so colourful

the next a grey dead bowl,

I live in such a shell 

or be it a bottomless pit

no drive,no ambition
easier to quit.

You are the the light that shades my darkness

you are the mirror on the stand

you are the colour that I need 

to hold this grey hand.

I cannot express myself in person

 but it's easier through words

I cannot talk to the one I'm hurting

the brightest in a flock of birds, 

The feelings I'm holding aren't fading

my heart is strong for you

but this greyness I can feel it pushing

please stay in view,

A single tear falls upon this pad

a heart that yearns to stop

a birthday that soon approaches

that's when the ball will drop,

Too many times alone 

already feeling defeated

Christmas is just around the corner 

excitement is depleted. 

call me a Scrooge, a Grinch or more

but please try to understand

I have no family in my eyes 

i'm alone in this grey land. 

I will make the effort for you 

I will bring out my best smile

I will act a whole façade

depressed all the while.

My urge to write is fleeing 

I've said all I had to say

just fight strong for us colourful bird

I need your colour in this world of grey

 

Author's Note

Ok this is not meant to rhyme it's not meant to follow any patterns this is raw emotional turmoil and I hope you love it

Thank you for reading please give honest reviews as always

Reviews

[trainwreck]

I cannot express myself in person
but it's easier through words
I cannot talk to the one I'm hurting
the brightest in a flock of birds,

Those lines really shine out from the rest of the poem. Even though this wasn't supposed to rhyme, it had a great rhythm. Further than that, your expression was smooth, and there was a sweet, almost painful, note of love through out this piece. There is something beautiful about trusting someone else with your darkness. Great job!

[freelancejouster]

almost seems dark without a purpose

[Akshat♥]

Feelings are sometimes didn't felt by the other person..
life is never easy...my friend
Awesome poem:)
Keep writing....

[Lily Mae]

Raw and honest is the only way to write if you ask me :) Excellent write.. I agree that "you are the light that shades my darkness"... love it..x

[Winters_Lost_Walk]

This writing is honest and heartfelt. That one person you end up hurting because of your pain, the person you rely on, and you end up feeling scared of losing that one special person. I especially love the phrase "you are the light that shades my darkness". The feeling of having that one person who colours your life is motivating and intriguing. It's an overpowering feeling. I sure hope your colourless days will pass soon =) and i'm sure that the person who lights your darkness will help you through, especially if you open up =) Amazing writing dude, loved every bit of it!

[fernii]

Great poem, :)

[ORBLE]

Really awesome poem and the rhyming and everything else that wasn't meant to follow a pattern, worked out really well. Since the person sees the world in grey, I imagine them to be rather negative and pessimistic but the colourful bird gives him hope to be freed. Maybe a little over the top, but that is really how I see it. Poetry can be very deceitful and not reveal its true meaning, leaving it up to the readers to use their imagination. A great write!

[Kes]

I really like this. In a funny way, I think I can understand... I don't know. How can I know? But I like how this seems to suggest a facade to begin with and reveals the person underneath later on.
I'd like to know your thoughts behind the poem, so I don't feel like I'm sitting here making assumptions. But then, I suppose poetry takes on different meanings for different people, so would it make a difference?
For me it's about feeling depressed even when you've only got one or two things to be depressed about. It's about pretending to be okay, when you're not.
I get that. Even if that's not what the poem's about!!
Great write.
x

[xXxCynicalWarsxXx]

The raw essence was and lingers in power. I find this to be touching and heart wrenching at the same time. the emotions ache inside my soul, and myabe not as much as yours, but enough to see a glimpse of what is inside. I want you to know that no matter the pain and anguish, no matter the abandonment you feel, you have something wondrous, something that cannot be compared to anything else: A heart. Your world is grey at times, and so is mine. Your world is going to be full of colors one day, some day, and I hope soon. The emotions is this piece, these words, they're all heartfelt through and through, not one emotion going unnoticed. I'm here if you need me, always will be. Fight the fine fight, and keep your head held up high! I know the waters are coming, icy and cold, but if you take this extended hand, I will do all I can to pull you out. And I will do all I can to take the grey misery away, and stuff your world with exotic colors that will never fade. Excellent capture and use of words. Always, forever, wondrous.