A Poem by Ne

Nothing more than empty pillars of sand

All it takes is one push to cause something so bland

When a hardship becomes the boat so small and frail

It capsizes breaking the sails

As it passes like a newly formed sunrise

The pain remains to remind us of the rise

Take the pain away, let the hardship sail

As the waves churn and your stomach becomes frail

May your strength save the dying sun

May your hardship pass as days in the month

The seasons change, They fade away

To nothing more than empty plains

© 2017 Ne

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This is very good. Strong message and poetic flow. Truthful words and honest opinions. Nicely done.

Posted 5 Months Ago

1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

There is depth and beauty in your words, I liked the last line the most, overall the poem has good transformation.

Posted 5 Months Ago

Within hardship, and after, is HOPE, which you've artfully conveyed in this poem. It's not the worn-out cliche ("What doesn't kill you makes you stronger'"); you've painted something brighter here. Brilliant work.

Posted 5 Months Ago


5 Months Ago

Thank you i was trying to bring upon a new view point of hardships

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3 Reviews
Added on December 6, 2017
Last Updated on December 6, 2017



Pascagoula, MS

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