She's such a pain in the HEART

I'm f*****g annoyed, why won't she lift her caramel-tainted eyelids

and unleash her toffee-seized eyes, the ones that made me fall

to begin with, and look at me, look at who you are through

ma eyes ya sillah bish, looka deepah, beyond da tearsh

that haf shpiked ma vishon, even fru da blurh

Ah c'n see she jusht as unhappeh ash a cat

wif no moush to chash, MEOW!

yet I hear her purrh, w'n

ah flirt shamelesshly wif

her, flickah

her hard

heart

with

my

wet

 and

 raw

 gay

z

you don't love him, you

just want the approval.

I can give love to you,          SO stop wasting your heart          I love you so much

               the way you want                        the air in that closet will run out soon

 

_______________________________________________

hungover

HEARTACHE.

Reviews

[Sonia Aurelio]

wow babe! i love this! the formatting is awesome too and the red wine in the glass is slurred and broken wonderfully.. i love it! and the following spilt red wine is the truth spilt that hes been tipped into reality! I LOVE IT! could lose the hungover heartache though but anyways! awesome work hun!

[MoriartyMesa]

First off the nice visual slap to the face with leather and lace is the icing on a very nice and eye candy for the reader. I could be off the mark, but my visuals were very different, and I thought the flow of this rocked.



Nice shaping.

does this mean you drink martinis or just champagne ?

[Alpris]

Thank you very much also, Michael! your kind words are encouraging and continue to give me hope. This was just an experimental piece but I'm glad it works :) thank you both for reading my work, you're both intelligently talented writers with bright futures, without a doubt

[Michael G.]

So, your imagination continues to amaze me. I can see the structure and how it fits the poem. You have shaped the glass almost as well as the words you filled it with. And I would have never thought drunken gibberish would/could work.
Excellent work, Misty.

[Alpris]

Hey Sonia, thanks heaps babe :)
I appreciate your critique, although I don't wanna cut the end. It goes well with the concept; it's kinda metaphorical in a sense... the hangover.
And instead of a headache it's a heartache because ... ugh whatever I'll explain it to you in class tomorrow. Thanks plenty!