Sheila's Glasses

Something meant to be pure, good hearted, cynical fun.

The glasses Sheila wore were the most God-awful things anyone had ever seen

Thick as the glass on the presidents limousine

One side of the frames was neon pink, the other was neon green

And across them were polka dots of yellow

 

They were so hideous that no one would come near Sheila

In all truth though, she was every bit as obnoxious as the glasses would have you believe

            She didn’t even need them, she only wore them because she thought they were stylish

Ironically enough, years of wearing the damned things made her legally blind

 

And if you’ll believe it, she found a seeing-eye dog that was even more annoying than her glasses

She dyed its hair aqua marine, and led it around on a leash coated in sequins

And with every step it took, it emitted an unnecessarily loud yelp

 

I haven’t seen Sheila in a few years

I heard someone shot her… Dear God, I only hope they got the dog too

 

 

Reviews

[Celtic Cat]

lol, I hope so, too! Nothing worse than a yappy mutt! While you were describing her glasses I recalled a pair of hideous neon pink frames on an otherwise Blues-Brothers looking shades. heh. Love the piece, as fun as advertised!

[Vanessa]

Very humorous.
The characters were nicely planned as well.

--vk

[Emily B]

Oh, James, it's so excruciatingly truthful that it's awesome. God forgive me, I laughed out loud. I've known a few Sheilas in my day. Yup, so funny.

[Wildfleour]

Oh Geez!