Paradise

Leaves fall from the trees, just for me.

Clouds glide across the sky, only that I might see.

The moon rises from the shadowy depths,

Immediately following the Sun’s burning footsteps,

Placing in my hand Heaven’s golden key.

 

Waves lap at the sands of the shore,

Beneath the unruffled birds that soar.

Tranquil air is stirred by gentle wind,

Fabricating a serenity to which there is no end.

I am forced to stare as my eyes beg for more.

 

They say paradise exists only in dreams.

Well, they’ve been misled, it seems.

For, when I hold you in my arms,

I see only Earth’s pleasant charms,

Reflected in your smile, as it gleams.

Reviews

[AdrenalineDrug]

great rhythm, exxcceellleenntt! i loved loved loved it! iono why, it was just...like, i couldnt even pick a favorite line or stanza. it was just too good. its so peaceful and yet like lush? just if you think of paradise, and leaves and just, iono, i just loved it. maybe the first two stanzas are my favorite. but its all so good! :)

[Balls:)]

wow... this is great. the line "i am forced to stare as my eyes beg for more"
that's nice... :) greatly wrote poem, sirr. :)

[Robyn]

This is such a lovely poem. I really like the last few lines, it ties it all together very nicely.

[Daniel Gardner]

thanks fordonation just added it to the book

[Crowley]

Some fantastic lines and great images here. This one is likely to rock you to sleep and give you sweet and unfettered dreams. I really liked it. Nice job.

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

I think this is very nicely written. I really liked it. I liked the descriptions as well. Thanks for sharing. :)

[Ashley.M.E]

this is a good poem

[Marie Harrison]

This is a remarkable poem. It's breathtaking to me. I can't understand why it doesn't have more reviews than it does. I enjoyed it's flow, the message, the positive and dreamy images. It's beautiful.

[Arasinya Adora]

Omg.... This was ADORABLE!

They say paradise exists only in dreams.

Well, they’ve been misled, it seems.

For, when I hold you in my arms,

I see only Earth’s pleasant charms,

Reflected in your smile, as it gleams.


Brillians lined there, well written piece over all. THe rhyme scheme was good, the flow was perfect, and it definitely was touching! Great great job deary!

~Adora

[little lily Bride of Ch..]

loved this Piece Nice write. Loved these lines,

Clouds glide across the sky, only that I might see.

Placing in my hand Heaven’s golden key.

Earth is'nt Paradise But what we make of it in this life cause we only get one Life. Beautiful Piece God bless