But what if I'm thinking too much

You're clearly indecisive.
Starting war with me out of frustrations , knowing the last thing that I want is us fighting .
Not physical but you killing my mental.
Being inconsiderate to the fact that I'm trying .
I'm being loyal to you, without trying.
But your blind to that.
You say that your real but I see the lies in that.
Because I'm still her to you,
and at times you still him to me .
So what's real between us, when it seem as though we're defining our own loyalty.
I'm sorry...
I might have said it wrong so let me explain to you what I really mean......
I forget him when you make love to me, but who you think about when you're holding me?
I love you enough to put the past behind me.
Even though you don't repeat his mistakes, I can admit that
I'm blind to the good when I feel like you hurt me and honestly that's the only time I think of him.
But when I was with him, it was you that I seen in my dreams
Even without a picture mentally,
It was you that I seen.
it was you that made me happy and put me out of misery.
But sometimes I try falling back because what if I'm not right for you.
No matter how much good I can do right to you.
What if I'm not that dream of happy that you can picture in a state of mind when dreams become a reality.
But what if I'm thinking too much.

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

"But what if I'm thinking too much. " :) aint it just the crux of the whole shebang! the intimacy of this prose makes it like a page of a diary ... kept under the mattress .. locked in a secret place .. so i felt holding it carefully was in order ... very relateable piece .. reminds me especially of some hard won wisdom of mine ... when overthinking in just such a way ..while asking my Lord for guidance ..for peace along with a decision to make .. i came up struggling day after day until that decision had to be made ..it suddenly occurred to me that all along the guidance was being given .. i was struggling because i wanted it to be yes ... and it was "I wouldn't recommend it Gene" (that's the way i think God talks to me;) so i called the guy and said no to a much needed job .. (i had a little carpentry business) turned out that the project fell through after a month or so with the job not getting done, the carpenters not getting paid and the general contractor skipping town (someone i had done business with before over several years ..never having a problem... lesson learned .. not saying this necessarily applies to your protagonist .. but it may ;))
E.

[Carla]

thank you and it does lols kinda

[writ rajat]

Very nice idealogy to protray oneself looking nice in profile