Chasing

Chasing

A Poem by Chloe..Across the Universe


I was chasing you
like a long lost dream
so silly of me
as if i should chase you

I was keeping up
until the polka-dots blew off
my dress
I stopped to gather them
fell behind

I was on your heels
like the hounds of hell
like a woman gone mad
chasing you

so silly of me to chase you
as if i should chase you

I almost caught you
rain came and drained me dry
i fell behind
just a bit behind

so silly of me to chase you
as if i should chase you
you’re always one step behind


© 2008 Chloe..Across the Universe



Author's Note

Chloe..Across the Universe
i just decided to see what came out as i set here.. this was/is it
strange and befuddled..

The picture is of our snow we finally got two weeks ago ! :)
So pretty

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Featured Review

Oh my gosh....I absolutely LOVE this piece! I picked out this as a favorite part:
I was keeping up
unitl the polka-dots blew off
my dress
I stopped to gather them
fell behind
It's so genius....I can actually see you stopping to pick up all your polka dots...how fun and original. The ending also blew me away....a brilliant twist. The whole piece is just fabulous, if you ask me. Good write!!

Posted 9 Years Ago


5 of 5 people found this review constructive.



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Reviews

Very Good, Chloe!
two gold stars for the polka-dots.

Posted 6 Years Ago


I wish I could see the pictures shown... as here today, they are not presented with your words. With its witty turn of phrase... I smile to giggle just a little, as your poka dots fall off. I had a picture of this...
A little like Dorthy.
A magical idea, to tweek my distance... as you, are now.
So far ahead of me. ;) In a short daydream, I was that guy...
Trying to track Chloe, across a vast universe.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Well...I'd stop and wait for you! This was sweet and I love the line about the polka dots!

Posted 6 Years Ago


The repeated phrase gives it a song-like quality and the imahes of the polka dots and the hounds and the rain made for a wild and delightful madness...

Posted 6 Years Ago


Chloe,

You take us on a whimsical chase. Befuddled. The game of love is a strange and elusive chase sometimes. Nice emphasis with the repetition. It has a lyrical quality.

Posted 6 Years Ago


An instant smile... love this witty whimsical bit of wickedness. well done!

Posted 6 Years Ago


My favorite is the polka dots falling off the dress... I love how you use repetition along with some very vivid, unique descriptions that turn the repetition again and again into something else. It's a very revealing poem as well as a fun read. GREAT job!

Posted 8 Years Ago


My favorite is the polka dots falling off the dress... I love how you use repetition along with some very vivid, unique descriptions that turn the repetition again and again into something else. It's a very revealing poem as well as a fun read. GREAT job!

Posted 8 Years Ago


I love this reminds me of us all innocent and chaseing after a boy because we know no other way..to get him to stop and let us just look at him.. maybe part of us never grows out of that..boy or girl sometimes..your heart makes your feet move fast .. well done

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

An absolute keeper. I love the befuddledness that makes it so sensible! This is definitely a keeper. You write with a gifted pen. Love your take on words. "Rain came and drained me dry"... But you really had me with the polka dots, love them and the image of them falling off and her stopping to pick them up. You are a truly imaginative writer.

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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54 Reviews
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Shelved in 8 Libraries
Added on March 25, 2008
Last Updated on March 27, 2008

Author

Chloe..Across the Universe
Chloe..Across the Universe

Smalltown, USA, AR



About
Sometimes i feel like an alien in a strange land..can you relate? I love people and friends are just that to me , friends-if you request me as a friend it would be nice if you read something I have .. more..

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