Rendezvous with me

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst .....
as we danced upon the moonlight

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst.....

when I’m holding you so tight

(Whispers)Trust me in our tryst....

l will never leave your side

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst....

as I grow with you

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst.....

I will die with you

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst.....

please don’t slam that door

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst....

we can go on some more

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst....

we can once more dance upon the moonlight

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst....

as the moonlight dies

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst......

as the starlight fades

(Whispers) Trust me in our tryst.......

beyond this life

Author's Note

Trust is everything

Reviews

[i am LiLy]

I have to admit....not being a writer or real poet......I had to look up the word 'tryst'....I'm a fool.

I do like this......I just don't trust anyone and never will....I have been let down so many times ....I can't get up again....

I do like your optimisation in humanity......I have non at all....

good words my friend....I like it.

[R.E. Ray]

So much richness in this poem, yet I felt distracted by the "Trust me in our tryst" repetition. If "trust" is what you want to convey, it's a bulls-eye. You drove that home. If you want to leave the reader with something more, you might consider limiting your "Trust me..." phrase to the beginning or ending of each stanza. You're a good writer, and there's so much good stuff in this poem, I'd like to absorb more of that. Thank you for sharing another piece of your art. I look forward to more.

[Simba]

Thank you for your words and I understand what your saying I think I’m trying to portray the the trust me in our tryst as soft whispers like the subconscious of the lover clingy on to that trust park as he is full of doubt but ultimately in love. Thanks again

[R.E. Ray]

You're welcome. You do that well. So, perhaps it's good as written. Just wanted to share my perspective.

[Simba]

So I’ve changed it up mainly the format to try and convey the subconscious mind, maybe I wrecked it who knows

[Einstein Noodle]

i like the strong story line and the emotive pleas of the lover to the "other" ... not sure the repetition lends more strength to the whole ... probably just me and i haven't had breakfast yet .. trust is certainly an important piece for relationships to thrive ...
E
ps. love those little baby feet in your avatar .. are they yours :))))

[Simba]

Thank you for your review I appreciate your comments

[KCthelastboyscout]

Lovely and amazing.sounds like you're praying.a romantic delight

[Unspoken poet]

Trust me in our tryst as the moonlight dies
Trust me in our tryst as the starlight fades
Trust me in our tryst and beyond this life

LOVE this part, loved the whole write.
amazing set up and enjoyed the rhyme scheme and the message behind the write.

[Simba]

Thank you for your comments

[Yahallo]

This is excellent! I love how some parts rhyme, and yes, the repetition is here nicely used!

[AliceBarnes]

Simply loved the use of repetition in this poem. I loved the little story that it had to tell and how it progressed as the poem did. It's short but you managed to fit in such talent that it scarce not matter. Loved it! Please keep writing and I will be more than happy to read and review your works.

[Simba]

Thankyou so much for your review I’m not big at long poems don’t want to bore the readers but sometimes less is more