chapter 1

South Carolina 1970

Chapter 1

            I sat on my worn out bed waitin’ for Miss Jones. Just earlier that day Scott and I had planned to set off our oversized sparklers in Katie’s room. Katie is one of the girls who lives at the home along with Scott and I, and a mess of other kids. The reason we chose Katie is because she’s a spoiled brat. She may be a gorgeous hunk of gal on the outside, but she can be rotten to the core on the inside. So, I waited on my bed while Miss Jones scolded Scott in the hallway, she’d come and get me next.

            Miss Jones is the orphanage warden. Let me tell you she is one of the worst people I know, besides Katie. She’s big and ugly, and loves the color grey. Her hair is always in a mangled bun to match her usual grey dress. She always has a mangy black cat with a dot of white on its nose that likes to follow her everywhere she goes. She don’t even have a name for the scrawny cat. So some of the kids settled for the name dog, which is a stupid name for it.

            Getting back to the fireworks, now I could see why she was mad and all now that I think about it. Nearly giving Katie and her roommate a heart attack, and almost starting a fire (it was fun though). I wish you could see the danger before you see the fun. Scott and I are the trouble makers of the bunch. Most anything bad you can think of we’ve done. Putting a rat into Jones’ bed. Slipping dead bugs into the watery oatmeal that the cook serves to us. We even stole the tires from Jones’ truck, to make four tire swings for the less fortunate children living at the orphanage. I don’t know why the old hag put up with boys like Scott and I.

            The door to the bedroom opened and Scott came in, followed by Miss Jones. She yells at the kids in the hallway to set an example for the rest of the kids who live in the home.

“Brady” Miss Jones said in her usual gravelly voice. I stood up and walked out into the hallway. She shut the door behind me and before she could get a word in edgewise I said in a slow voice that parents use when they repeat things to each other,” I know, it was dangerous, somebody could have gotten hurt, and the whole building could have burned down” 

            Jones scowled at me.

“Brady, I assume you know the consequences by now.” I did; it meant dish duty every night for a week, “Yes, you do know what could have happened, do you know what did happen?” she asked in her disgustingly mocking tone. I remained silent, not willing to give her the pleasure of me answering to her.

“Katie fainted and hit her head on the edge of the table, and her textbooks were burned. You’ll have to pay for them.”

“You and I both know that I’m broke.” I wasn’t really, but who wants to spend all the money you have on stupid textbooks?

“I guess it will have to be you who shares your books with Katie until we replace them.” Then in a slightly more sympathetic tone she said, “Brady, in two weeks Scott will be eighteen and legally we would have to let him off our leash.” she stopped to let it all sink in,” you may go to your room now.” She ordered, then she whipped around and trudged down the hall and around the corner followed by dog.

            I noticed a few others had been listening and watching. Now they just stared at me, I shot them a dirty glare and they went into their rooms. Now I was alone in the hallway feeling pretty low. Like I had been punched in the stomach or swallowed a piece of ice. Either way I felt alone. I came back into the room Scott and I shared and lay down on the bed. I focused on one spot in the ceiling that had been stained. I had completely forgotten about that day, when Scott would leave me. Yes, I may be sounding over dramatic but who wouldn’t, Scott’s practically the only thing I have.

“How can so much evil be stuffed into so much beauty?“ Scott said.

“Old lady Jones?” I asked.

“Naw, Katie.” Scott told me,” She doesn’t have to use our books, she could just use her roommate’s.”

“Yeah but what fun is that to Jones?” I asked.

“True” Scott said, he was silent for a while, ”Katie didn’t really faint.” Making no comment he continued his story,” She got in a cat fight with her roommate, what’s her name? Stacy! That’s it. Anyways it was over some guy they liked in school and Stacy threw a book and it got to Katie” Scott waited for me to make a comment. When I didn’t, he stopped talking and copied me, sitting silently on his bed.

After a while he asked, “What’s the matter? You and I could go on for hours talking about Katie.”

“Nothing left to talk about I’m guessing.”

He sighed, “Elmer picking on you again?”

“Who’s Elmer?” I was fairly sure I had never heard of and Elmer before.

“I don’t know. It’s something people from the Brady Bunch ask each other. Then everything gets turned right-side-up and you’ve got yourself and episode.”

I laughed. “You really are something.”

We were both silent for about 10 minutes. Scott tried to entertain himself with a book, but he sensed that something was wrong.

I don’t think I could live a life without Scott. It would be like losing mom and dad all over again, but this time I wouldn’t have anyone to protect me. Luckily I knew Scott wouldn’t leave town until I was out of the orphanage. Nothing would seem the same unless he was always at my side.

I was startled by a loud slap. Looking over at Scott I saw he had slammed the book shut.

“Okay. What’s up?” he questioned.

“What do you mean, ‘what’s up’?”

“Usually you can talk about Katie for hours. Usually, when Jones yells at us you aren’t so quiet. Now, what’s up?” he said giving each “usually” great emphasis.

           I looked straight into his golden eyes, quietly I replied,” Usually we don’t pull stunts that dangerous-“

“The heck with that! What is it that’s bugging you?”

            I paused not yet wanting to confide to my brother, looking at him we locked eyes,” I just wish you won’t be eighteen in two weeks” and I looked away. After Scott did not say anything for many moments, I stood, drew a shaky breath and said,” I, ah, need some air.”

            I walked down the hallway staring at the ground. I couldn’t help but feel like I had said those darned words terribly wrong, but I guess they needed to come out somehow. It was maybe not done as gracefully as I wanted them to, but what’s done is done. I stepped out into the cool autumn sun. The littler kids were occupying themselves quite nicely in the courtyard with dolls and such. There was one in particular whom I was quite fond of. He was picked on a lot by the other kids until Scott intervened. Now he had a few friends and lived happier.

            I had just walked past the gateway and was walking down the sidewalk when I heard a familiar voice call out to me.

“Brady!”

            I turned to see the face of Scott. He ran to catch up to me. Then we started walking down the street again. For a while I listened to him pant.

 “Look” he started,” This won’t come out the way I want it to.” he stopped talking a few seconds to breathe while the cold air rushed through his golden hair, “Brady, I will not leave you the way mom and dad did. Who cares if I get kicked out in two weeks! What matters most is that we stay close. Physically, yes, but mostly mentally” he stopped to look me eye to eye (I’m just as tall as him). And in the utmost sincere voice he told me, ”I love you buddy.”

            At that moment in time I felt the urge to give my brother a hug… Because I was cold. We walked a little ways further down the street.

“Tell me again about Katie.”

 

 

Reviews

[Vawn]

Ok some advice here, you have a good use of description, but those chunk of paragraphs describing Scott, Ms. Jones, and the narrator. It get's kind of boring, with the long description. Sometimes too much detail is bad, and so is too little detail. The three paragraphs devoted to description stall the reader from getting into the story quickly. I know some people who love that type of description, but just as well you will turn many people off also. Try dropping subtle hints on the character appearance here and there.

The punctuation, you should go back and edit the story, I got a little confuse with your quotation marks, and sometimes lack of periods.

Like here “Brady, I assume you know the consequences by now” should be > “Brady, I assume you know the consequences by now." And your very last sentence needs as period also.

Hope this helps you

-Vawn