Night Call,Part One

i was a stranger on a strange land

 

I did not want to write this

it was one cold day it was raining, it was night early night ,in that magical island, I had a night duty, I was feeling  blue ,I was away from all ,family and everyone I knew back home ,the feeling was so strong ,I was so oppressed, I did not know what to do ,I usually had these spells, not easy to break.

I was on the third floor, it was half through the night, I knew some nice nurses there, and two were really heart breaking.

They would come to my room for some advice or call me to see a case; we were like ghosts moving through the night, everything was sad for me really, if not for the nice faces of two breath taking nurses. Sometimes they call for me just to tease, I remember one in the 2nd floor, each time I look into her eyes ,I forget all my troubles away ,I sometimes joke with her ,I tell her I come here to forget ,myself and my life ,she just laugh and look at me in that lovely sweet way ,and says I know ,I know, I am here ,I will make you forget your world ,I said please do ,then she would eye me in that naughty way and say ,what is it you mean ,so I just look back and enjoy more of that lovely face ,but I pull myself away ,for I really do not know what I want from her ,or what's she really after me for.

I get a call now from emergency down on the first floor ,I feel so tired and not willing to move ,but I just look at my sweet friend ,and tell myself its better that way ,the spell was broken so I pull myself away ,saying to her: duty calls ,she looks somewhat mad but she tells me to my back :you wont run away from me ,you hear ,I am after you ,and I hear a faint laughing...

I walk down the stairs ,and come to the front building of the emergency and come to the front door while I am going in I look back at the driveway ,and head there ,there were lots of gardens ,the rain still went on ,and I just stood there ,where I could feel the rain drops hitting somewhat hard on a soul really feeling bad ,oh dear rain ,wash my decay ,I want to come out of here clear and clean ,I could feel the drops on my head ,its like I want to wash the dirt away, but no way could I do that ,as sweet as the rain was ,and the breeze from the sea hissing softly by my side bringing all the aroma from the lovely sea all around me ,its so nice I even cried a little ,I cannot see so much beauty in this world ,I feel numb all over and then I shake my self of such mad thoughts I bring a towel from a hand bag I carry with me wipe the tears and the rain drops ,and arrange myself a little ,and straighten my clothes and go inside.

The first face I meet , the second heartbreaker ,the nurse on the first floor ,there were two heartbreakers ,one on each floor ,I remember first meeting her when I joined the hospital staff, she asked me ,where you from deary ,I remember I just looked to that heavenly face ,I have really seen non like it before ,she was so tall, thin all legs ,face so different from others ,but its usually the eyes ,I just kept looking deep into them ,then I pulled myself back to realty ,I was still new by then everything seemed so strange and I said, I come from Iraq .I could never forget the way she just looked at me ,mouth gaping wide took long time to think over my words and said ,yes and I come from Mars, she looked as if offended her and waiting for me to correct my words and apologize ,but I just stood there helpless as if saying what can I say ,you could easily be from mars and I am from Iraq.

The long pause made her understand ,and said ,oh my God ,you really come from there ,I heard ,there is no one left there, they said you were all wiped from the face of earth ,and serves you right she cried at me and said ,serves you right ,fighting all the world around you and smiled ,I just stood there ,I did not know what to say ,I just kept silent , while she seeing me like that ,I could see tears in her eyes ,saying oh no my dear I was joking ,I know you were fooled in all the things you have gone through ,my sister worked in Iraq, she told me you are a peaceful people ,you just never had a chance ..to live ,you only had a chance to die ,and now I was surprised ,tears were gathering so strong in her very beautiful eyes ,I just stood there like a jerk ,I did not know what to say ,I just said again and again yes dear ,I am from Iraq I was almost like in a trance, I said it three times ,she came near ,I was surprised she just took my head in her arms and kept looking at me ,oh thanks God you are alive are there so many like you ,never hurt with everything limbs ,legs and all sorts of things we human usually have ,now almost laughing and crying ,I could never forget that encounter ,that’s why I love that dear girl ,she is always in my heart and mind ,for she cares ,and there are not much who really care anymore these days.

 

Author's Note

i really did not want to write this

Reviews

[Derek Cummings]

At times I find my best writing derives from a dark mind. This piece really got my emotions involved, the realism and drama put my mind in in a place such as this story, therefore, good job. I enjoyed much and would only suggest not use so many commas(reduce your sentences).

Peace

[bluessadmood]

thank you so much ,glad you liked it

[A.A.Romanczuk]

How your pain floods across the distance to me...the more I read of You, the more conscious I am of the atrocities You have born...and yet they have not ruined the beauty of Your soul...extremely well-written and despondent...

[Kristin Brecoe]

this is sooo emotional. it's vivid. it makes me feel like i'm apart of this story. you really did make yourself vulnerable with this piece.

my only suggestion is breaking this up and giving it more structure.

[Helena]

"......and I just stood there ,where I could feel the rain drops hitting somewhat hard on a soul really feeling bad ,oh dear rain ,wash my decay ,I want to come out of here clear and clean ,I could feel the drops on my head ,its like I want to wash the dirt away, but no way could I do that ,as sweet as the rain was ,and the breeze from the sea hissing softly by my side bringing all the aroma from the lovely sea all around me ,its so nice I even cried a little ,I cannot see so much beauty in this world ,I feel numb all over and then I shake my self of such mad thoughts..."

Oh this part was so touching and sad my friend......to not be able to see the beauty in this world and feeling numb is so tragically sad. I hope many people read and review this....this is cold hard reality of what you and your country men, women and children endure day after day, year after year and decades after decades.

What you have written here is beautiful Moayad, it puts a human face and human feelings so eloquently on a painful way of life and you are to be applauded for your sensitivity and courage. Very well written with superb imagery thoughout. Thanks for sharing this my friend, it was an absorbing read. ~ Helena

[Robert Francis Callaci]

There is a rawness to this that gives a stark face to the emotional ruin that war brings. The innocent suffer while the politicians and religious elite get fat. Relentless suffering as the rest of the world watches with a full belly and crocodile tears. I can't imagine living through this day after day and the only solace is the faint hope that the world will someday care and put an end to this madness-but at least those that do care offer a little bit of solace--- one person at a time.

This was an effective piece manly because of the realism of the write- not pretty and fancied up- just real.


my warmest
bob

[Gandré]

your writing bears always a kind of sadness, it is drawn through the entire text. It is telling me about lifes behind lifes... even one thinks a physician works such long hours that his life happens in small breaks between runs from one to another patient. So the relationships often happen with co-workers, many dream of it, I am in hospital and I even can see it. With this piece you also make aware at the situation in Iraq, you see how people are bad informed, we have a different opinion on this war and especially me for I see the big picture in the context of history. Not only the girl in your story, we here in Germany also are so sorry for all the loss what happened during the war. I am glad Obama is going to make leave 12,000 troups from Iraq, this is a nice beginning, isn't it? I love it. Very thought-provoking writing, I find it important that you write from your point of view and show us, what leads us there, where we didn't look.

[Helena]

It must have been so hard for you to write this and I understand why.
The emotions must have just torn you apart with each word penned.
A superb write, one of your best.

It does seem nowdays that people don't care, but belive me there
are still some of us around my friend.

Helena

[Ken Simm.]

I'm glad you did. Emotive and powerful.

[Emily Elizabeth]

(HUGS)
I was at a mesopotamian work shop today, telling ancient Iraqi stories with other Iraqis. They're all so brave, and so are you. Sudam may have gone but the horrors of the people lives on.
One day the horrors will seem less prominent. One day.
This is, as ever, a beautiful piece. You write so intelligently. And it sounds like there is a lot of love and beauty around you! Thanks for sharing!

[CharlieO]

This is a highly emotional and involving piece. Sometimes writing comes from the dark areas of our mind that we do not really want to address - but part of writing is therapy.
Content wise this story is very good - the story engaging as is the narrator. Your have some wonderful phrasing throughout - i like the two heartbreakers. My only criticism would be with your grammar - your sentances are a little too long - you need to add some full stops where you have commas. Aside from that this is a great write.
Congrats on this story.