Mangled Angel Wings

Mangled Angel Wings

A Poem by DoormanDan
"

Accepting that regret cannot be overcome is far worse than just facing it on a daily basis

"
Mangled Angel Wings

I cannot pretend
That I don't understand the suffering this choice brings
But still, in pretense
I try to take flight with these mangled angel wings

I've become a sickly shell with the lawless lies I tell
And now I'm left to drown in the smoldering skies of Hell
But for this curse I've been dealt I can only blame myself
I've earned what I deserve
I deserve what I've earned

Memories never heal
They only mock our souls with thoughts of time we have lost
The secrets I conceal
Have coated the grasslands of my humble heart with permafrost

I've become a sickly shell with the lawless lies I tell
And now I'm left to drown in the smoldering skies of Hell
But for this curse I've been dealt, I can only blame myself
I've earned what I deserve
I deserve what I've earned
My conscious is forever forlorn
My heart is forever worn
My soul is forever torn
My demise is born

© 2017 DoormanDan



Author's Note

DoormanDan
There's nothing really fancy about this piece this time around; I just wanted to write something more emotive than my usual work. I was partly inspired by the song "You" by Breaking Benjamin. This will probably be the last piece I write before my winter break ends (though remember, every time I say that, I end up writing something else in record breaking time...for me, anyway). Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading this piece, and as usual, tell me what you think. See ya next time! :)

My Review

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Reviews

I find it interesting ... the title drew me in and the poem kept me lingering .

I love this piece ... your a natural don't ever sell yourself short with your writing ...


This I do not feel is missing anything .

You depicted this poem nicely ...

I look forward to some read requests from you . :) L. 😌

Posted 8 Months Ago


DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

Oh trust me, if I was a natural, I wouldn't give myself so many headaches over trying to make every .. read more
Farmgirl

8 Months Ago

Hehheeh I know what you mean..m

And very welcome..


:)
I like your theme and your symbolism!

I think certain parts could flow a little better, but the slightly disjoined flflow also complements the theme.

Well written

Posted 8 Months Ago


DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

Thanks for the review. If there is anything about my writing that is weaker than other things, it's.. read more
Janet91Rochester

8 Months Ago

You're welcome,

I would like to read your next piece, and will keep an eye out for i.. read more
DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

I'm going to try to finish and post the next one by Sunday if I can. After Sunday I'm going back to.. read more
see ya next time Dan...I liked this a lot, as with many poems on here it reads almost like a song thanks to the slight but effective repetition. Shows great imagination and a depth of character too...all in all, pretty damn good

Posted 8 Months Ago


Dr. Wood ?

8 Months Ago

I AM an honest person, I am also MAINLY a rhymer...The only real advice that I can give to someone w.. read more
DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

True words. Thanks. That's definitely something I need some work on. :)
Dr. Wood ?

8 Months Ago

Don't rush stuff, it will come
I love this, the emotions I get from this it amazing. not gonna lie I'm fangirling over this. it's amazing you're such a great writer. can't wait to read more.

Posted 8 Months Ago


Shae-Leigh Johns

8 Months Ago

dude, of course and good luck with college, I'm a junior (in highschool) so I just got this year and.. read more
DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

Thanks, and good luck to you during your last two years. Make 11th grade count a little more than 1.. read more
Shae-Leigh Johns

8 Months Ago

I'm trying to I have , 3 advanced class and I'm taking all 3 ap course and I've scheduled my SAT's f.. read more
Dan, I really like the concept of the write and how you vocalize from words heard. Just one remark from me. Demise is never born,,just look up and receive. Valentine

Posted 8 Months Ago


DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

In a literal sense, yes, demise is never born, but this is a poetic line, not a literal one. I'm es.. read more
"lawless lies"
"conscious is forever forlorn"
"demise is born"

I enjoyed the last stanze and how you brought the poem together. Wonderful read! And thought provoking :)

J

Posted 8 Months Ago


DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

Well, I'm glad to hear that you think so, Jenny!! Thanks for reviewing! :)
Jenny

8 Months Ago

youre welcome :)
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Zoe
It's really great to see how most of your poems are inspired by songs and how neatly you put forward your thoughts regarding it. This is no exception. An outburst of emotions, feelings of regret. Is it only my perception or have you missed out a word in the description of the poem-"Accepting that cannot be overcome is..."
By the by, it was a great poem!

Posted 8 Months Ago


DoormanDan

8 Months Ago

Awww nuts, I didn't realize that! Thanks for pointing that description goof out! Anyway, I tend t.. read more
Zoe

8 Months Ago

Don't mention it!

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Added on January 30, 2017
Last Updated on January 30, 2017

Author

DoormanDan
DoormanDan

Dover, DE



About
I'm a twenty year old young man who enjoys writing poetry, songs, stories, paintball and other things. My favorite things to do are parkour, video games, listening to music, and making people happy. .. more..

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