My Way Out

Please call my only doctor

and somebody call the nurse.

Message my taxi driver

and his ever loyal hearse.

Please call my momma.

And maybe call my dad.

Tell them that I love them;

convince them that I'm not bad.

'Cause I'm on my way out.

It took a while to see,

see, 

I'm been on my own.

Free.

Livin' life like my

king.

Not worried about a

thing.

Now you think I'm fine,

aye?

Livin' my life my

way.

Only problem is

I

would rather give up and

die.

Now without a single

doubt

I'm moving on my way

out.

Please call my only doctor

and somebody call the nurse.

Message my taxi driver

and his ever loyal hearse.

Please call my momma.

And maybe call my dad.

Tell them that I love them;

convince them that I'm not bad.

'Cause I'm on my way out.

What do you

say?

Why don't we spend a 

day

doing what we

like.

It's like learning to ride a

bike. 

Try, try and

fall.

Learn to make the 

call.

For once in your life pretend you're not on the

floor.

Take another step and open up the scary

door.

Close it behind you.

My door's another route.

Back behind the counter, where the men all sit and pout.

'Cause I'm on my way out.

Expected another chorus, did ya?

Used to my repetitive patterns? Tricked ya.

Does that rhyme?

Does that chime?

I don't care at all because it's my time.

No more time to waste, I'm hopping on my own

bandwagon as we go round and round. My tone

has changed over the past few months, as you know.

I don't know where it will stop or the places it will go.

But I write faster every time, leaving patterns behind. 

Making my own path down a road. These chains, they bind

my ankles so tightly and sometimes it's hard to walk.

Even harder to talk.

All they do is balk.

Now we're all alone, 

right?

Nights are shining so

bright.

Our phones are shiny

twilight.

We're heading for the 

last flight.

Faster, faster, closer, louder.

Thin and flaky, lost like powder.

That's the description of our fame.

The one we earn from a stupid game.

The one we earn by a stupid name.

The one we'll give our lives to tame!

But I'm sick of this mess.

I'm sick of social doubt.

I'm sick of inequalities,

and learning to live without.

So take this message, keep it.

I'm on my way out.

Please call my only doctor

and somebody call the nurse.

Message my taxi driver

and his ever loyal hearse.

Please call my momma.

And maybe call my dad.

Tell them that I love them;

please convince them I'm not bad.

'Cause I'm on my way out.

Take my life!

Take my life!

Take my days!

Destroy my strife!

Take my head!

Take my bed!

Take the demons

inside my head!

GET OUT!

Oh. Oh.

I'm on the way out.

At last.

I'm on the way

(((((())))))))))          ()              ()               ()()()

                             () ()           ()               ()     ()

                             ()   ()         ()               ()        ()

()()())))(((((()      ()     ()       () ()           ()

     ()      ()       ( ()            ()

     ()       ()      () ()          ()

))))()((()(()))(      ()         ()   () ()()()()()

                                          () ()

    ((

Reviews

[dan]

david, This piece is simply f*****g GREAT. It reads like an anthem, a declaration to the world that who you are is how you'll stay...till the WAY OUT beckons and begs to be led. Your rhyming and rhythm/beat stays steady and stormy; the use of CAPITALIZATION and different size fonts can tend to be overused at times but you use them in a great way, for emphasis and impact RIGHT ON TIME!
You know, david, that I don't usually read stuff this long, but this piece drew me in and held me close...focus sharpened and stylized. Quite possibly your best write, IMO. This gets saved in my library favorites. And I think I'll send this out to others who's writing and judgement I wholly respect (if I can figure out how that's done). Congrats on this killer write! take care...dan

[Not here]

thank you very much dan :) i really appreciate it and that'd be very nice of you.

[andrew mitchell]

What an epic well structured piece of writing! Well done! In awe of this terrific write!

[Not here]

im thrilled you like it so much :)

[Emily]

Loved it!
Very well written!
Keep on writing!!

[Not here]

thank you emily :)

[Brittany Bostic]

This is incredible! I LOVE your use of rhyming and how the words worked with each other. the format is so interesting that just visually it is demanding a readers attention. The words themselves are great but the message is great too. As I it it become more of a rap like poem. Who said writing couldn't be modern and still good? There is a lot of talent here. The capitalization got my attention but more than anything it was how all of it: the format, the words, the story, the bold lettering, came together and just ended in a wonderful, award winning poem. This work is something I want to read over and over again! It is so expressive and purely great!

[Not here]

thank you very much :) I really appreciate your review Brittany. I'm thriller you enjoyed it that much

[Riley Justine]

Awesome emphasis and use of capitalization and fonts. Really well done, David :)

[Not here]

thank you very much RIley :) I appreciate it.

[θεά]

THIS.

HAD.

MY.

HEART.


JUMP.

[Not here]

:) awww. thank you. im glad you liked it. i think you liked it. hahaha

[Rafy T.Nym]

An innovative writing with wonderfully expressed emotions!

In literature, we play with words, feelings, stories and most of the time it seems natural. But, your work proves that literature can play with our mind too. You wrote the poem with such a natural and free flow, but the writing never left the main theme, that's a wise work. I'm really impressed and most of all inspired.

[Not here]

thank you for your review :) im really glad you liked it and the points you made were wonderful.

[Not here]

and I'm certain that you're just as talented and probably more so than myself :) so good luck.

[Rafy T.Nym]

You're more than welcome. Thanks a lot for the kind reply. :-)

[Coyote Poetry]

I enjoyed the words. They danced upon the paper and came alive.
"Take my head!
Take my bed!
Take the demons
inside my head!
GET OUT!"
I liked the above lines. Thank you for the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Not here]

thank you very much Coyote :) i really appreciate it

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[JayceeC]

I'm so glad I caught this one, David. It has a lot of hallmarks of your earlier writing in rhythm patterns that take your reader all over the place, but now you do it with absolute control. This is word art, and slam style poetry which is meant to be performed, not just read or spoken. Don't get me wrong, your flaunting of the rules to create visual form is highly attractive too, but it will also make great spoken art.
Jan

[Not here]

thank you very much Jan :) i like your new profile pic. and i really appreciate your review

[JayceeC]

Thanks for the pic comment. I changed it a while back but haven't been cruising the site much. I'm getting ready to turn requests back on though. :)

[Not here]

alright :) ill try not to overload you lol. i havent been on here much lately either.

[Amber Lily]

Most impressive! I love that you took this piece out of bounds as to how a 'regular' styled poem looks like. It's art, there is no certain way it's meant to appear, all of your different sized texts truly made it unique and drove your points home. Like you said, you just keep writing and you do it fast. Rules and expectations don't apply here, poetry should be free! Fantastic work :)

[Not here]

thank you amber :) thats a cool profile pic. and im really glad you liked it

[Amber Lily]

Thank you! and your welcome :)

[Nisreen]

Dante a write to complete freedom
from all that holds a man down
Its a beautiful write filled with hope and love for life

Beautiful

[Not here]

thank you very much riversided :) i appreciate it