days of a present past

days of a present past

 

 

 

in autumn

i will leave you,

 

a bonfire of burning veins

the blood extended on branches bowing

 

there we were, falling for each other once

now memories crunch underfoot,

 

when the wind settles

and the solid gold bands

bristle in cold October flame

 

we pass ourselves

like seasons that lost purpose

 

but refuse to release grip

from a tree of false hope.

 

 

 

erin-cilberto

10/9/15

Reviews

[h d e rushin]

spoken eloquently like a Midwesterner who wraps the perfume scented scarf of a lover around his
neck before taking a walk in the Illinois of Autumn crispness. Yet this poem starts with a declaration,
not an observation and ends with a metaphor of optimism instead of the ersatz a failed romance.
(Tremendous interplay)

sometimes you got to just gotta know what your talking about to convey what your truly feeling about.

dana

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, dana.

j.

[icelandicblue]

Autumn is such a fiery season but it happens in a flash and falls to the ground in defeat. Beauty like that burns brightly, but perhaps it is only dormant awaiting the delicate greens and blossoms of spring. You capture autumnal imagery with finesse and the éclat of a master painter.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i like that idea of defeat..and so quickly, yes.
thank you for your insights, Anne.
j.

[rubie]

you know how i feel about the moody blues....

i am also reminded of "forever autumn" by this piece.

i love the 3rd couplet. exquisite piece.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, rubie.

j.

[annalysiar]

That was an amazing prom thanks for sharing

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, annalysiar.
j.

[annalysiar]

You're welcome😇

[highonwords]

love that once bloomed, but now has become mere memories, 'though there is that hesitancy to break out from that season of love, clinging instead to a 'tree of false hope'. thank you for sharing, jacob :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, letterhead.
j.

[Fran Marie]

The dying embers of love lost in October's cold flame...great metaphor throughout
This well penned poem.

.nice work

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Fran Marie.

j.

[MsJewel]

I love the melancholy feel of your words Jacob...so autumn like...

I've missed reading you!'

Julie

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Julie...have missed seeing you around. hope you are doing okay.
read morethank you for your words, Julie...have missed seeing you around. hope you are doing okay.

j.

[MsJewel]

I'm doing great - thanks. Just needed some time away,,,,,

[Terpsichore]

Autumn, no more it could be argued, than the interlude betwixt glorious high summer and the cold onslaught of winter, but it is also the most mellow and beautiful of seasons. No trees of false hope, simply a sensible shedding of over abundance and an understanding that what eventually re-emerges can be both re-invigorating and longer lasting.

A masterly write. T

[jacob erin-cilberto]

and such an insightful review...thank you for your kind words, T.
j.

[Roland Petrov]

An elderly married couple who no longer love each other? The seasonal metaphor works nicely, and the poem is beautifully written.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your words, Roland,
j.

[PoeticChico]

Sweet Poem!
enjoyed it a lot, Thanks for sharing!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Alex.

j.