Who Will Wipe This Blood Off Us?

Hide-and-go peek.

Slice my skin and peel the layers back,

Tabula razor, bleached onion.

Poor and white as melting snow,

The shavings slip off smoothly.

Ah, the air stings my insides.

Plasma, run true. Strike your mark

With delicious drops of goodness,

Pollock, Quentin, Jean-Luc.

Il n'est pas de sang, il est rouge.

To bleed or not to bleed, that is digestion.

Blood, blood, wet my feet.

Spread your paint across my sheet

So I can finally fall asleep.

Author's Note

Reviews are always appreciated. The title is taken from Nietzche's "Parable of a Madman." The painting is Pollock's "Ruby Red Circus."

Reviews

[barleygirl]

WOW! This is amazingly imaginative for such a cruel punishing topic! So many messages on this website sound dire & depressed, but in this case, you've made sorrow into art (which to me is the point of writing). You use so many flip-flopped & uninhibited expressions to describe the feelings, it's really quite amazing. For example: "To bleed or not to bleed, that is the digestion" . . . this is so freaky interesting truthful thought-provoking. It helps me get outside me own usually rigid straightforward style of thinking & writing.

[Ethan]

Thank you so much

[Savannah B.]

This one already has so many nice reviews!
I just wanted to add that I love that you used more than one language, somehow it makes it sound even more diverse and poetic. You really put in some thought provoking imagery and it is very inspiring to say the least.

[Sam]

Wow. This was a very meaningful poem; your words where smooth, and rhythmic, and I really liked the context. good job!

[MaximumFlight]

So morbid and descript. I love it XD

[pragya gaur]

A very creative piece Ethan.... Loved this.... Thanks for sharing

[Davidgeo]

Tabula razor = table razor .... good one.

[AcasualPawn]

Punishing oneself till death.....

[Faith Knoll]

"Slice my skin and peel the layers back" wow...amazing imagery! My only recommendation would be to pick between "delicious" or "goodness" in the line "with delicious drops of goodness". For example, maybe "with delirious drops of goodness". I was thinking maybe showing in that line a feeling of bitter-sweet.

[Ethan]

Hmm, not a bad idea and thanks for the review. However, delirious drops would imply insanity, which is a theme I wanted to avoid. I intentionally left out any negative descriptions.

[Faith Knoll]

interesting! I didn't even realize that good job :)

[Mr.Writer]

An engaging, creative piece Ethan!
It may be short but leads on to many different thoughts and emotions!
Well done, keep it up!

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Wow this intelligent flowing write has shades of philosophy, Shakespeare and Snow White combined. Overwhelmingly though the vision of suicide seems to lurk beneath the surface?

[Ethan]

Yes, certainly.