it goes like this

it goes like this:
i sit, transfixed

solo in front of the television.

i'm all alone, my sweet boy

slumbering in childhood's sleep

in the bed we share

like we have since his infancy.

there is a knock

subtle, almost unheard at the door.

i take care not to knock

my wine glass

with bare feet

tread softly over.

revealed, against the night sky

the outline of familiarity.

the unexpected

and yet yearned for.

darker 

and more filled out.

master of the sun

my only

understood

ever loved

longed-for one.

like when we first met

you were healthy then.

a thrill shoots from somewhere

in my solar plexus

breathless

and i want to reach out

and touch.

still forbidden one

keeper of my heart

my knees buckle.

and out it comes

all at once

tears, sweat, fear

hate

and all that's passed between.

i offer it all

to your release.

maybe you gently kiss

the trace of tears

leading down my cheeks.

maybe you smooth the hair back

from my forehead

and bless me there.

maybe we don't say a word

and just let our bodies speak.

this is how it goes

when i imagine you coming back to me.

Reviews

[wolfshrew]

I can't say I've ever felt the ache for someone to come back, but your writing made me feel as if I had.