An Island of Snow (Over, Around , Under and Through

An Island of Snow (Over, Around , Under and Through

A Poem by J. R.
"

An abstract song I wrote in my spare time

"
An Island of Snow (Over, Around, Under and Through)


Did you ever hear the Jaybird’s call
 As it leans against the wall?
It watches the children with its diamond eyes
And telling them filthy lies


 Waking up at midnight
Head drenched in sweat
There is something you don’t get
Dreaming of an island of snow
That’s where all the bad ideas go
To fade away alone

Long ago and far away
 When the rats came out to play
Deep beneath the curve of space
A phantom’s cruel, grinning face
Staring into the light

Golden bats flying low
Where the gray winds flow
To the place where bad ideas go                                   

© 2010 J. R.



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Reviews

an interesting concept, giving a place for bad ideas to go. an interesting read

Posted 6 Years Ago


I like this piece. It seems that everyone does have a place they store their bad ideas. (: That's what this piece reminded me of. Fantastic write.

Posted 7 Years Ago


Thats good. Getting published good

Posted 7 Years Ago


its different... great write

Posted 7 Years Ago


I really like the imagery you've used in this.

The only thing that bugs me is the end of the first verse. The second last line seems a bit too long, and the last line seems a bit too short, so they mess up the flow a little bit.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on August 5, 2010
Last Updated on August 20, 2010
Tags: island, of, snow, bad, ideas, diamond, eyes, lies, children, gold, bats, golden, phantom, face

Author

J. R.
J. R.

About
I am an aspiring writer who is interested in improving as a writer and getting my work out to the world. . more..

Writing