Home Sweet Home

A nice opinion of moving

Home is where the heart is
I know this to be true
You lose that bliss
When someone leaves you
I was left in a shelter
My family moved so far
My brain was helter skelter
My emotion was sub par
I've met my future husband
And we have a home so fair
He has been a godsend
For he is always there
Soon we will move in
And move away from woe
Our new life will begin
As we declare it so

Author's Note

My story about moving into a real home and out of a shelter

Reviews

[Norbanus]

This verse shows us a tale of life and love,
A story that can last throughout the years
The man says 'Yes! We fit like Hand in glove.'
A soul mate that's for life devoid of tears.

Your touching story shows us one can deal,
with obstacles set down through life's distress.
The courage and determination seal,
the melding which can power through the mess.

In few words you have spun the tale quite well
and show the hope we all desire to feel.
An issue with the form that well might tell
upon the smoothness of the rhymes appeal.

Reluctantly, there's one thing I must say.
If broken into quatrains this verse might
present more as the standard three act play,
and add some to the reader's great delight.

Just take a look and see how this appeals;
the only slight improvement my heart feels

Home is where the heart is
I know this to be true
You lose that bliss
When someone leaves you

I was left in a shelter
My family moved so far
My brain was helter skelter
My emotion was sub par

I've met my future husband
And we have a home so fair
He has been a godsend
For he is always there

Soon we will move in
And move away from woe
Our new life will begin
As we declare it so

[Gaurimaginary]

beautifully written and constructed. well done.

[Annette Pisano-Higley]

Your poem is inspiring and so touching Savanna! Beautifully written with great form, flow, rhyme and spirit. I can’t imagine how hard your life has been. What courage and grace you possess! I wish you and your husband a lifetime of love and happiness in your new home together. God bless you my friend.