ape domenigoni

I love music, it inspires my creativity in everything I do. I look for bands I connect deeply with and right now those are Floater and Blue October; they are such a big part of my world, my writing, my being.
I have spent most of my life being completely miserable without knowing why, my poems reflect those feelings because it was the only way I could effectively communicate when I was locked so deep inside myself. My stories reflect my longing for love, a family, friends so I created stories involving close knit hand-picked (not always blood) families where I could live vicariously through them.
Four years ago I found out I have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) which explained a lot of the patterns in my life, why friends left, people turned on me, my freaking emotional issues etc. and I set out to change my way of thinking. Helping me through all of this chaos was God, music, writing and my amazing husband and I'm 100% sure I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for the perfect combination of all four.
I have been living a wonderfully happy and content life the last couple years as a result of figuring out what the problem was all along, getting rid of all causes of stress and drama and focusing on my own healing and my family.
The unfortunate side effect of that has been no desire to write, I've had nothing needing escape, nothing to say in general. My novel has been on hold for years.
Until recently...but it's no longer dark and depressing things I want to write. I'm more into blogging about music or things I create. And now that I know there really is a light at the end of the long, dark, depressing tunnel I want to finish the love story I've been writing and rewriting since I was 16. I'm starting to feel like I finally have a realistic ending I can use in it. So that's an interesting twist to my writing...happiness...who knew?