Paula Henslow

The thing is, I'm not really good when it comes to writing introductions about myself. What I usually do is explain who I am in the style of a diary. So first things first, let me tell you that I've always been an infamous girl, known as the notorious b*tch who's a killjoy and always have this nasty sneer pasted on my face. I usually hate people in general because it just comes with my nature. I always have a hard time socializing ever since I was a kid. People usually misinterpret my actions. And people usually dislike me by first sight because I act the way I shouldn't and I act the way I am not. Crowded places gets me on edge, I really don't like them most especially if they're full of people I know. There are times when I get anxiety attacks or get paranoid for no particular reason. Although I like being alone most of the time, loneliness still scares me. Certain people hate me because they think they can understand me and my actions and maybe they are right. Or maybe they're wrong. Or maybe at one point they almost correctly guessed my personality. As far as I am concerned, I like putting up facades because it's just that hard for me to socialize and befriend people. I socialize with friends whom I know best, and I don't think that should even be called socializing since they are only a few people, about five. There are acquaintances, of course, and some smile at me when I pass them by and I try to smile back at them, but it comes out all forced on my part. It's very exhausting for me to smile than to frown. I also have a hard time trusting people and I tend to be really sarcastic that people then avoid me due to this. If I did learn to trust a person, I kind of cling to them until both of us get annoyed with one another and afterwards, I start to push that person away. That's basically who I am. When it comes to writing, though, I never let my personality affect my works, except when I think it should. I admit I'm not really that good but you judge for yourself. No one can ever remove my love for writing.